All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– R.I.P. The Equalizer star Edward Woodward, who died in England on Monday.

– And MTV’s Remote Control host, Ken Ober, who died on Sunday.

– So, Mad Men star January Jones on Saturday Night Live … not so much.

– Kathy Griffin‘s taking her “D-list” fame to a scripted series: She’ll play a lesbian activist on the Feb. 10 episode of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit.

– Seinfeld and Curb Your Enthusiasm producer/writer/director Larry Charles is teaming with McG (House) to produce an NBC comedy pilot about a group of small-town sci-fi fans who film their own version of a canceled TV series.

– A fourth season of Torchwood could be a go, as soon as January, as per series creator Russell T. Davies. Anything that brings John Barrowman back to the tube on a regular basis: good thing.

– The Secret Diary of a Call Girl‘s call girl isn’t such a secret anymore. Turns out, she’s a research scientist whose trick for paying for her PhD was turning tricks.

– George Segal will star in TV Land’s upcoming sitcom Retired at 35, which sorta sounds like the “Shit My Dad Says” Twitter feed.

– Speaking of words that can’t, or rather, didn’t used to be, said on TV, the New York Times breaks down how “douche” has become a very popular term on TV, at all hours. I suspect Jon Gosselin has inspired more than his fair share of those uses.

– And speaking of the Gosselins, mark this date on the calendar: Nov. 23, the date TLC airs the series finale of Jon & Kate Plus 8.

– Also to mark: This link in your bookmarks: TV Crunch.com’s super handy guide to holiday specials.

– And tonight in primetime: House (8PM ET, Fox) treats a porn star with an eye issue; Barney re-enters the dating scene on How I Met Your Mother (8PM, CBS); Back-to-back episodes of The Prisoner miniseries on AMC (8 and 9PM); Lady Gaga guest stars on Gossip Girl (9PM, The CW); Buddy bakes a talking cake on Cake Boss (10PM, TLC); E! counts down the 10 Vampires We Love at 10:30PM; and Bravo premieres Chef Academy (11PM), a reality series in which British chef Jean-Christophe Novelli moves to LaLaLand and stars a cooking school.