(ALL TIMES ET)

9:30PM | NBC
Parks and Recreation – Remember what happened the last time Ron Swanson (Nick Offerman) and his ex-wife Tammy (guest star Megan Mullally, Offerman’s real-life wife) got together? Insanity ensued, which is why Tammy’s return in tonight’s episode is must-see TV. Especially since her return is brought about by Tom (Aziz Ansari), who begins dating Tammy to get back at Ron, who’s dating Tom’s ex-wife Wendy (Jama Williamson). Also, a jail cell is involved, so, again, must-see TV.

8PM | FOX
American Idol – After weeks of those drawn out city auditions, the action moves to Hollywood, where we’ll finally see which wannabes have the chops to make it into the finalist pool.

8PM | CBS
The Big Bang Theory – Leonard, a gigolo … Sheldon, his pimp??! If a wealthy widow (guest star Jessica Walter) who wants to donate big bucks to the university – provided she gets some one-on-one time with Leonard – has anything to say about it.

8PM | NBC
Community – The last time I saw Andy Dick‘s name in the news, he was getting thrown out of an awards show for porn. Tonight, he’s guesting on Community. A step up, to say the least.

8PM | ABC
Wipeout – The Hockey Hottie, Mr. Grinch and Holiday Hams … you guess which ones are contestants and which ones are Wipeout obstacles.

9PM | ABC
Grey’s Anatomy – Papa Grey returns with a stomachache that means he’s rejecting the liver Meredith so thoughtfully gave him. He’s also bringing a young, tattooed girlfriend with him, which means Mer’s gonna have a stomachache, too.

9PM | NBC
The Office – Michael and Holly spend Valentine’s Day together, which gives me more hope that the writers will send Mr. Scott off with the happy ending he deserves. Well, the happy ending for him that the audience deserves, anyway.

10PM | NBC
30 Rock – It’s Valentine’s Day and Carol (guest star Matt Damon) is back, which, in Liz Lemon Land, probably means romantic trauma ahead.

10PM | FX
Archer – Archer may be someone’s babydaddy. His favorite hooker’s babydaddy, actually.

10PM | MTV
Jersey Shore – Ronnie, Sammi fight. Ronnie mad. Ronnie smash!

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Stefan and Elena try to get romantic on a trip to the lake on The Vampire Diaries (8PM, The CW);
– Booth and Sweets have commitment on their minds on Bones (9PM, Fox);
– On Nikita (9PM, The CW), Michael meddles in Alex’s life with Nathan;
– Colleen helps protect U.S. marshals on Police Women of Cincinnati (9PM, TLC);
– Ace and the gang make a Back to the Future cake for Michael J. Fox (!) on Ace of Cakes (10PM, Food Network);
– And rebellious teens visit San Quentin on Beyond Scared Straight (10PM, A&E).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Seth MacFarlane and Brooklyn Decker;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Former RNC chairman Michael Steele (REPEAT);
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Author Michael Lewis (REPEAT);
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Snooki (yes, that one);
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Rob Lowe, Amber Riley and Nicki Minaj;
– Lopez Tonight (Midnight, TBS): Brad Womack and Taylor Momsen;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Jimmy and Justin Bieber perform their Twitter song;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Jennifer Aniston and Piers Morgan;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Jennifer Beals;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Diplo and Alberta Cross.