(ALL TIMES ET)

8:30PM | NBC
Parks and Recreation – Chris is bummed that he’s – lit-rally – alone on Valentine’s Day, while Leslie arranges a cool Valentine scavenger hunt for Ben, who needs Ron’s help to figure it out.

8PM | NBC
30 Rock – Liz and Jack wrangle over her new contract, while Kenneth looks for a new page assignment after getting the feeling his TGS cohorts are giving him the cold shoulder.

8PM | FOX
American Idol – Auditions move to St. Louis, home of the Gateway Arch, which you have to take the world’s scariest, most claustrophobia-inducing diagonal elevators to ascend.

9PM | NBC
The Office – Angela spawns.

9PM | LIFETIME
Project Runway All-Stars – The designers have to approach strangers on the streets of New York City, ask them for their clothing and then make new outfits out of them. The clothes, not the strangers, silly.

10PM | FX
Archer – Archer and the gang team up with Mounties to transport a Canadian terrorist on a train. Hilarity, of course, ensues.

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Fat Chef – In Cleveland an overweight chef and an overnight caterer try to deal with the issues that have plagued them partly because their jobs require being around food 24/7.

10PM | MTV
Jersey Shore – The episode is described thusly: “Snooki deals with an uncomfortable condition.” Please don’t let it be something festering, requiring penicillin or both.

10PM | CBS
The Mentalist – A clothing designer attempting a comeback is murdered. That – pause, remove your sunglasses a la Caruso – is truly a fashion faux pas.

11PM | MTV – SERIES PREMIERE
I Just Want My Pants Back – It’s a comedy about twentysomething slackers living in Brooklyn. Despite that, it’s actually pretty good.

11PM | BRAVO
Watch What Happens: Live – Because, really, how can you not watch when Andy Cohen hosts Snooki and JWoww?

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The friendship contract is in danger when Leonard finally tires of Sheldon’s, uh, Sheldon-ness on The Big Bang Theory (8PM, CBS);
– Klaus hosts a dinner party with an unexpected guest on The Vampire Diaries (8PM, The CW);
– New winter Wipeout on ABC (8PM);
– It’s the what-if/flashback-y episode of Grey’s Anatomy (9PM, ABC) … proceed at your own risk;
– On Person of Interest (9PM, CBS), Zoe comes back and helps Reese with a case involving an unlucky person of interest;
– B.o.B., Gym Class Heroes and the All-American Rejects perform at the Pepsi Super Bowl Fan Jam (9PM, VH1);
– Pete sees Violet kiss Scott on Private Practice (10PM, ABC);
– Chris Rock is the interview subject on Inside Comedy (11PM, Showtime).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): John Krasinski;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Dr. David Agus;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Christiane Amanpour;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Woody Harrelson;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Drew Barrymore;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Gary Oldman;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Adam Levine and Taylor Lautner;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Daniel Radcliffe;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Mario Batali.

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• Filed in 30 Rock, American Idol, Late Night, The Office, TV Picks

(ALL TIMES ET)

8PM | FOX
American Idol – Preliminary auditions move to Portland, Oregon. Five things about Portland: 1) The city’s nickname is The City of Roses; 2) The Simpsons papa Matt Groening is from Portland; 3) Also from Portland: Beverly Cleary, the author of the beloved Ramona Quimby and Henry and Ribsy books; 4) Home of Powell’s Books = 68,000 square feet of books; and 5) And, of course, it is the home of and inspiration for Portlandia.

8PM | CBS
Super Bowl’s Greatest Commercials – Boomer Esiason and Jillian Michaels co-host this look back at the all-time best SB commercials, and a look ahead at the best ones we’ll see this Sunday.

10PM | ID
Dark Minds – Are the 2006 murders of Atlantic City prostitutes the evil handiwork of the same person who later killed prostitutes in Long Island?

10PM | MTV
Real World/Road Rules Challenge: Battle of the Exes – Wes is pining for Mandi, while one contestant gets wicked drunk and causes serious issues.

10PM | USA
Royal Pains – Hank’s back probs lead Dr. Van Dyke to fill in for him.

10PM | BRAVO
Top Chef: Texas – Pee-wee Herman‘s the guest, and the chefs have to create “imaginative” pancakes he’ll love. Love so much that he wants to marry them.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Julian has a big case of the guilts on One Tree Hill (8PM, The CW);
– On Hot in Cleveland (10PM, TV Land), Elka talks about basketball with Baron Davis, while Susan Lucci visits Victoria.

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Ringo Starr;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Brad Pitt;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Ameena Matthews;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Howard Stern;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Daniel Radcliffe;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): John Krasinski;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Tim Tebow;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): William Shatner;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Glenn Howerton.

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• Filed in American Idol, Betty White, Late Night, Sports, TV Commercials, TV Picks
• Tags: Super Bowl's Greatest Commercials CBS

(ALL TIMES ET)

8 and 9PM | NBC
30 Rock – First up: Whilst Tracy champions the world’s morons, Jack dukes it out with Devin Banks and messes with Liz’s relationship with Criss. In the night’s second ep, Kenneth looks for a new page assignment when he thinks the TGS crew doesn’t love him anymore. The installment’s called “The Ballad of Kenneth Parcell,” and after last season saw precious few Kenneth storylines, it’s a very welcome development to see Jack McBrayer getting more screen time this season.

8PM | FOX
American Idol – The auditions head to the city Glen Campbell sang about. No, there’s no city called Rhinestone Cowboy, silly. It’s Galveston.

8PM | CBS
The Big Bang Theory – Penny and Leonard are reunited and it feels so, well, less weird than Raj’s new relationship … with his virtual phone assistant.

8:30PM | NBC
Parks & Recreation – Leslie goes bowling for votes when she hosts a bowling soiree to whip up support for her campaign. Her pals, meanwhile, compete to see who can raise the most cash for her political efforts.

9PM | LIFETIME
Project Runway All Stars – The designers have just six hours to design a fabulous outfit that will be judged by – Gasp, clutch the pearls – Diane von Furstenberg.

10PM | FX
Archer – When Cyril (Cyril!) gets promoted to field agent, he, Archer and Lana head out on a dangerous mission. Made all the more dangerous by the fact that Cyril has been made a field agent.

10PM | MTV
Jersey Shore – The Shore gang heads to Staten Island to convince Vinny to return to the smelly, smelly beach house. Staten Island … smelly beach house. Staten Island … smelly beach house. Yep, that’s a tough call.

11PM | SHOWTIME – SERIES PREMIERE
Inside Comedy – The series features David Steinberg interviewing comedians about their careers and what influences them. First up: Jerry Seinfeld and Don Rickles.

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Jon Heder and Cuba Gooding Jr.;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Tilda Swinton;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Drew Barrymore;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Regis Philbin (REPEAT);
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Jim Parsons (REPEAT);
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): J.B. Smoove and Andre Agassi;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): John Mulaney (REPEAT);
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Craig tours the Palace of Versailles;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Wale (REPEAT).

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Still my all-time favorite American Idol contestant: Season five third-place finisher (but shoulda-been-winner) Elliott Yamin is releasing his third CD, Let’s Get to What’s Real, on March 27.

The first single and video, “3 Words,” are out now, and it’s Elliott doing what he does best, a great R&B tune.

Check out the video below, and follow him on Twitter, where he’s been hinting at some big happenings in the near future:

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• Filed in American Idol
• Tags: Elliott Yamin 3 Words, Elliott Yamin new CD

(ALL TIMES ET)

9PM | FOX – SERIES PREMIERE
Touch – Kiefer Sutherland is back on TV as New York City widower Martin Bohm, whose autistic son detects patterns in numbers that allow him to predict the future. I know, I know, it’s tough to really get a feel for the show from the commercials. And it’s even tougher when, during a confrontation with a man in the premiere, Kiefer gets punched in the stomach … that never would have happened to Jack Bauer! But once you get past that, and resolve to sit back and enjoy the story as it unfolds at a leisurely and mysterious pace, it’s a fine premise, with an emotional payoff. It’s still not 24, but … definitely worth checking out this preview airing, before the show premieres in its regular timeslot in March.

8PM | FOX
American Idol – The action moves to Aspen, Colorado, where Nicolas Cage‘s kid auditions. I kid. I think.

9PM | CBS
Criminal Minds – In the show’s 150th episode, the team tracks a serial rapist known as “The Piano Man.” I hope Mr. William Joel has his people registering his offense at that name.

10PM | CBS
CSI – Farewell, Marg Helgenberger.

10PM | ID – SERIES PREMIERE
Dark Minds – Yes, it’s like a real-life Silence of the Lambs when crime author M. William Phelps, criminal profiler John Kelly and a convicted serial killer team up to reexamine serial killer cold cases. This reality show’s version of Hannibal Lecter: “13.”

10PM | MTV – 22ND SEASON PREMIERE
c – The contestants arrive in the Dominican Republic to try to win their share of the $300,000 grand prize. The glitch: they’re paired with the ex-boyfriends/girlfriends/flings/one-night stands, etc. in their quest for the cast. Among the pairs unhappy to find out they’re face-to-face (and other body parts-to-body parts during the challenges): C.T. and Diem, who I always thought (hoped) would eventually reunite.

10PM | USA
Royal Pains – Hank goes golfing with Jack (Tom Cavanagh), but has to deliver some bad news. If it’s the news that Ed has been cancelled, we know, and we’re still sad about it.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Haley gets help from Dan at the café on One Tree Hill (8PM, The CW);
– Elka’s making crank calls on Hot in Cleveland (10PM, TV Land);
– Cat Cora is the guest judge on Top Chef: Texas (10M, Bravo).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Timothy Olyphant and John Mulaney;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Paula Broadwell;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Terry Gross;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Scarlett Johansson (REPEAT);
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Robin Williams (REPEAT);
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Cuba Gooding Jr.;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Robin Thicke and Donnie Wahlberg (REPEAT);
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Jean-Michel Cousteau (REPEAT);
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Weezer (REPEAT).

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• Filed in American Idol, Betty White, Late Night, TV Picks
• Tags: Dark Minds ID, Real World/Road Rules Challenge Battle of the Exes, Touch premiere