(ALL TIMES ET)

8PM | ABC – SERIES FINALE
Extreme Makeover: Home Edition – Ty Pennington and crew have built more than 200 homes for deserving families in their nine seasons on the air, and as they, sadly, leave primetime as a regular series, they go out in a big, classy way: Building seven homes in seven days, a whole neighborhood, for families in tornado-ravaged Joplin, Missouri.

1PM | ABC – SERIES FINALE
One Life to Live – The citizens of Llanview (Llanviewians?) bid daytime TV adieu, after more than 43 years on the air. Saddest of all: there will be just four daytime soaps left come Monday, and none filming in New York City.

8PM | NBC
Chuck – Bo Derek guest stars as … Bo Derek, and she factors into a mission that includes Morgan facing some blowback from his days as the Intersect. Meanwhile, after tonight, just two more weeks before Chuck and his pals ride off into that big Buy More in the sky.

9PM | CBS
CSI: NY – A perfect family turns out to be anything but, which the CSI-ers discover while investigating a break-in at the fam’s home.

9PM | FOX
Fringe – Peter heads off on a dangerous mission to the alt world, where he plans to confront Walternate.

9PM | NBC
Grimm – When a fugitive seeks vengeance on the people who helped jail him, his tolerance for pain and crazy strength make Nick suspect he might be a monster.

9PM | THE CW
Supernatural – Dean is sent traveling, time traveling, back to 1944, where he is arrested by one Eliot Ness.

10PM | NGC
America’s Most Hated Family – Documentarian Louis Theroux, who once spent and documented a summer with those Westboro Baptist Church folks in Kansas, revisits them for a week and finds out things have changed since last he visited. Oh, they’re still batshit wackadoo, but now the younger members have started to leave the flock, as the rest of them wait for the end of the world and continue to spew hate at pretty much everyone who isn’t one of their own.

10PM | CBS
Blue Bloods – Oh oh oh oh oh, oh oh oh oh … Danny (Donnie Wahlberg) and Jackie are on the case of a diner murder, and their chief suspect: a fellow cop.

10PM | IFC
Portlandia – It’s the one you’ve been waiting for: Doug and Claire obsess much over Battlestar Galactica.

10PM | NETWORK – 10TH SEASON PREMIERE
Real Time With Bill Maher – Herman Cain is among the guests, though Jon Stewart has pretty much wring all the funny out of that opportunity.

10:30PM | IFC
The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret – Todd tries to get Alice a job at her favorite restaurant and … well, you know.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– A teenage girl abandons her newborn baby at the clinic on A Gifted Man (8PM, CBS);
– Chef Ramsay helps modernize a Georgia eatery on Kitchen Nightmares (8PM, Fox);
– Percy threatens to get all destructive with Division unless Amanda lets him go on Nikita (8PM, The CW);
– New America’s Most Wanted on Lifetime (9PM);
– Tenisha, Sherrie and Jared go to New York to support Shane on his music video on Girls Who Like Boys Who Like Boys (9PM, Sundance);
– Deadly Women (10PM, ID) is actually deadly girls tonight, as the episode focuses on murders committed by school-age females.

And the late-night line-up:
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Tony Bennett and Viggo Mortensen;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Jennifer Hudson and Tilda Swinton;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Tracy Morgan (REPEAT);
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): John Mulaney;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Kristen Bell;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Kreayshawn (REPEAT).

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• Filed in Blue Bloods, Chuck, Daytime TV, Late Night, TV Picks

(ALL TIMES ET)

10PM | SHOWTIME – 7TH SEASON FINALE
Weeds – The season lost a little steam towards the end, but here’s hoping for a last-minute rebound as Nancy deals with the fact that one son, Silas, is not on her side, while the other, Shane, is trying to protect her from Detective Ouellette. And then there’s Doug, who’s desperately trying to keep his hedge fund scam going.

CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS FOR TIME AND CHANNEL | PBS – 42ND SEASON PREMIERE
Sesame Street – Science and technology are the themes for the new season, which will also include spoofs on Glee and The Deadliest Catch and guest stars like Robin Williams, Seth Rogen, Mila Kunis, John Krasinski, Joel McHale and Andy Samberg.

1PM | ABC – SERIES PREMIERE
The Chew – Mario Batali, Top Chef alum Carla Hall, What Not to Wear co-host Clinton Kelly and Food Network chef Michael Symon host this daily foodie show that replaces All My Children.

8PM | THE CW – 5TH SEASON PREMIERE
Gossip Girl – Serena makes a big boo-boo at her Hollywood job, and, while visiting her in Los Angeles, Nate meets an older woman (Elizabeth Hurley).

8PM | CBS
How I Met Your Mother – Ted tries to make nice with a girl he once cheated on, while Barney makes a bet with Marshall and Lily that may mean Marshall has to wear Barney’s ducky tie.

8PM | FOX – SERIES PREMIERE
Terra Nova – The sci-fi drama finds colonists (including Life on Mars star Jason O’Mara) travelling back to prehistoric times to create a new civilization because, well, their present one has become so miserable. Of course, they’re going to have to deal with dinosaurs that want to eat them, and a military-minded leader (Avatar‘s Stephen Lang) who wants them to fit neatly into his agenda. Yeah, I know, I can’t help but think Land of the Lost myself, but at least the special effects are less cheesy, as they should be considering Steven Spielberg is among the show’s producers. Bottom line: to watch or not to watch … yes, definitely worth checking out, but don’t set that season pass just yet.

9PM | THE CW – SERIES PREMIERE
Hart of Dixie – Rachel Bilson plays a heart surgeon who moves to a small town in Alabama to share a practice when she’s told she needs to work on her bedside manner. Lost you at “Rachel Bilson plays a heart surgeon,” didn’t I? The O.C. alum has her charms, but this show might not be the best use of them. Still, I’ll probably watch a couple more episodes, especially since equally charming Friday Night Lights alums Scott Porter and Cress Williams are in the cast.

9PM | BRAVO
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – It’s been all about Taylor so far this season, but the new chick enters the fray tonight when Kyle hosts a charity event and Brandi Glanville, the ex-Mrs. Eddie Cibrian, attends and immediately ruffles some feathers.

10PM | LOGO
The A-List: New York – Derek and the gang head to Atlantic City for Austin‘s bachelor party and Nyasha‘s concert.

10PM | ABC
Castle – Castle and Beckett are chasing a vigilante who may be responsible for murder and who also may be wearing a superhero costume while out doing his vigilante work.

10PM | CBS
Hawaii Five-O – So … that happened last week. Tonight, the action continues as McGarrett’s back in action, but the Governor assigns a new officer to keep an eye on McGarrett and the Five-0 team.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The jive and the quickstep are on tap for the contestants on tonight’s Dancing With the Stars (8PM, ABC);
– Eight more groups perform in the second part of the season premiere of The Sing-Off (8PM, NBC);
– The Bling Ring (9PM, Lifetime) is the Lifetime flick, starring Jennifer Grey, based on the true story of the group of teens who burglarized celebs’ homes in Hollywood in 2008 and 2009;
– The weekly four-ep It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia marathon on Comedy Central (9PM) includes the gang’s Lethal Weapon 5 flick;
– Season two of Mike & Molly (9:30PM, CBS) opens with Molly (awesome first time Emmy winner Melissa McCarthy) starting to plan her wedding to Mike;
– On Alphas (10PM, Syfy), season one wraps with Red Flag stepping up its war on the Department of Defense;
– On Cake Boss (10PM, TLC), Buddy bakes an edible chandelier cake that has to hang upside down;
– A Civil War drum is among the goodies brought into the store on back-to-back Pawn Star$ (10PM, History);
– On the season two finale of The Big C (10:30PM, Showtime), Cathy decides to do something special to ring in the New Year after Lee’s death;
– John-John finds out that one of his relatives is a zombie on Death Valley (10:30PM, MTV).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Kevin Hart, Neal Brennan and Taylor Lautner;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Ron Paul;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Radiohead;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Seth Rogen;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Ryan Gosling;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Dana Delany;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Elmo and Andy Samberg;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Jonah Hill;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): The Decemberists and David Guetta.

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• Filed in Daytime TV, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Late Night, Movies, Real Housewives, TV Marathon, TV Picks, Weeds
• Tags: Castle, Gossip Girl season 5, Hart of Dixie, Hawaii Five-0, How I Met Your Mother, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Sesame Street season 42, Terra Nova premiere, The A-List: New York, The Chew ABC, Weeds season finale

(ALL TIMES ET)

11PM | VH1 CLASSIC
Nirvana: Live at the Paramount– Sept. 24 is the 20th anniversary of Nirvana‘s seminal Nevermind album, and VH1 Classic marks the occasion tonight with this 1991 Seattle concert, which has never been aired on TV before.

1PM | ABC – TV SERIES FINALE
All My Children – Say farewell to Erica Kane (daytime diva Susan Lucci) and her fellow Pine Valleyans, who bid adieu, at least to TV land, after 41 years. The show is scheduled to live on as a Web series, but it’s still incredibly sad that, beginning next week, there will be just five daytime soaps left on the air. And when One Life to Live ends in January, just four. Sigh.

8PM | CBS – SERIES PREMIERE
A Gifted Man – Patrick Wilson is top NYC neurosurgeon Michael Holt, who becomes a more compassionate dude when his kind ex-wife begins visiting him … as a ghost. The best part of the cast is newbie Emmy winner Margo Martindale (Justified), who has little to do in the pilot. Hopefully show producers will remedy that right away.

8PM | FOX – 4TH SEASON PREMIERE
Kitchen Nightmares – Chef Gordo visits a restaurant in Plainfield, New Jersey, and, just guessing, is mean to its owners. And then tries to help them.

8PM | THE CW – 2ND SEASON PREMIERE
Nikita – Nikita and Michael plan to use the black box to take down Division and Oversight, but new boss Amanda has other ideas.

9PM | CBS – 8TH SEASON PREMIERE
CSI: NY – Mac and his squad flash back to the events of 9/11 on the day’s 10th anniversary.

9PM | FOX – 4TH SEASON PREMIERE
Fringe – And we pick up with the Fringe team one week after Peter disappeared, with the two worlds maintaining an alliance. Reluctantly.

9PM | THE CW – 7TH SEASON PREMIERE
Supernatural – Castiel warns Sam and Dean not to get in the way of him and his new God role, but Dean tries to convince Death to tangle with Castiel anyway.

10PM | CBS – 2ND SEASON PREMIERE
Blue Bloods – Jamie gets his first undercover assignment, the new mayor asks Frank to spin a story to cover up the truth about a murder and Carrie Underwood and Tony Bennett are guest performers.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Lester Holt takes over as the new host of Dateline NBC (9PM, NBC);
– A cool headphone-cord holder is among the handy inventions on Quirky (10PM, Sundance);
– Michael Moore is among the guests on Real Time with Bill Maher (10PM, HBO);
– Will Joel McHale poke fun at himself, as an Emmytone, on tonight’s ep of The Soup (10PM, E!)?

And the late-night line-up:
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Nathan Fillion and Larry Miller;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Hugh Jackman and Tony Bennett;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Ty Burrell (REPEAT);
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Beyonce, Taylor Lautner and Florence Henderson;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Gerard Butler;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Melanie Pullen.

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• Filed in Blue Bloods, Daytime TV, Late Night, Music on TV, TV Specials
• Tags: A Gifted Man premiere, All My Children series finale, Blue Bloods season 2, CSI: NY season 8, Fringe season 4, Kitchen Nightmares season 4, Nikita season 2, Nirvana: Live at the Paramount, Supernatural season 7

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– He’s contractually obligated to not appear on TV until after May 1, so Conan O’Brien won’t talk about the Tonight Show saga … until May 2, on 60 Minutes, in an interview with Steve Kroft.

– There’s certainly no lack of famous types in need of rehab after public meltdowns, and TMZ.com says that means the producers of VH1’s Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew are going after big names like Heather Locklear, Charlie Sheen and wife Brooke Mueller and the trainwreck that is Lindsay Lohan to join the cast for next season.

– West Wing star Allison Janney will guest star in the May 11 episode of Lost, but the bigger news is that that episode will finally, supposedly, answer all our questions about the Locke-ness monster.

– If you’re a 30 Rock fan and you’re in New York, here’s a great way to spend a few hours: Time Out New York magazine’s 30 Rock Walk.

– Adam Lambert has been the best guest mentor on American Idol this season, and I think he’s the best candidate so far to replace Simon Cowell at the judges’ table next season, but alas, he’s not interested.

– Add another TV name to the upcoming Smurfs big-screen movie: Paul “Pee-wee Herman” Reubens.

– True Blood fans, no need to wait ’till June 13 for new episodes. There’s a new minisode at HBO.com right now.

– James Franco did it, Julianne Moore did it for a day and David Hasselhoff is going to do it; now add Sean Young to the list of big-screen stars who’ve gone to daytime, as Young will be joining the cast of The Young and the Restless in June.

– Buzz is that Desperate Housewives may be renewed for two more seasons on ABC, after which it would ride off into that big TV graveyard in the sky. Anyone else think it’s sort of played out already? How many big mysteries can one little neighborhood have? Really, Marc Cherry.

– Glee fans are lovin’ the show’s music, and Billboard mag points out that there have been plenty of other TV series that have used music as part of their success stories.

– Is America’s Got Talent judge and Celebrity Apprentice alum Piers Morgan the next Babs Walters?

– Former NBC and now TNT cop drama Southland will live on for a third season.

– He’ll be a part of the Parks and Recreation cast next season, and Brothers and Sisters star Rob Lowe is making a guest stop in Californication first. Lowe will play an actor who’s a leading candidate to play Hank Moody (David Duchovny) in the movie version of Hank’s book.

– If all the foodie programming on Food Network and TLC still aren’t satiating your appetite, get ready for the Cooking Channel, which launches on May 31.

– And fantastic news: Mrs. Dexter, a.k.a. Jennifer Carpenter, says her hubby, her Dexter co-star Michael C. Hall, is fully recovered from his battle with Hodgkin’s lymphoma.

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• Filed in 30 Rock, Boob Tube to Big Screen, Daytime TV, Glee, Lost, TV News
• Tags: Adam Lambert American Idol judge, Conan O'Brien 60 Minutes, Lost Allison Janney, Michael C. Hall recovered, Paul Reubens Smurfs movie, Sean Young Young and the Restless, Southland season 3, The Cooking Channel, True Blood minisodes

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– Crystal Bowersox on last night’s American Idol? Wow.

– Not only is Betty White hosting Saturday Night Live on May 8, but her musical guest will be Jay-Z. Be prepared to fall in love with Betty White, hip hop fans.

– The Daily Beast interviews Al Pacino about his HBO movie You Don’t Know Jack, which premieres Saturday night (8PM ET). Pacino plays “suicide doc” Jack Kevorkian, and it truly is his best performance in years and another great made-for-TV flick from HBO.

– If you’re planning on throwing a Lost finale party on May 23, make sure you have plenty of snacks and libations on hand: ABC is planning five hours of Lost-themed programming that night, including a two-hour recap special, the two-hour finale and Jimmy Kimmel Live: Aloha to Lost, an hour-long special that will feature Lost showrunners Carlton Cuse and Damon Lidelof, as well as several cast members.

– Kelsey Grammer is among the backers of a new right-wing TV network, which will feature shows like a conservative comedy series and Running, a reality show that will follow six people running for political office for the first time.

– Glee fans, cancel all plans for May 18. That’s when the Joss Whedon-directed episode of the show airs. The episode also includes Neil Patrick Harris guest starring as Will Shuester’s high school rival, as well as guest turns by Molly Shannon and Idina Menzel.

– Don’t hassle The Hoff: David Hasselhoff‘s doing a good thing by making a return appearance on The Young and the Restless, the CBS daytime soap that gave him his big break.

– Tori Spelling, the next big talk show host? Could be.

– Meanwhile, CBS is reportedly planning a talk show to rival The View, with Big Brother host (and wife of CBS honcho Les Moonves) Julie Chen, Roseanne and The Big Bang Theory star Sara Gilbert, Lisa Rinna and Real Housewives of New York City‘s Bethenny Frankel as panelists/hosts.

– Add I Dream of Jeannie to the list of TV shows being developed as big-screen movies.

– More series renewals: Burn Notice has been renewed for a fifth and sixth season, even though the USA show’s fourth season doesn’t premiere until this summer; NBC has ordered a second season of Parenthood; and Fox has given the thumbs up to a 23rd season of Cops, the network’s second longest-running series.

– TV show premiere dates: Rescue Me‘s sixth and final season debuts on FX on June 29, while Mad Men‘s fourth season will debut on AMC on July 25.

– VH1 has a whopping 44 original series on tap for the rest of this year, including a new installment of Divas, more reality programming with Dr. Drew (how does this guy have time to live his own life when he’s so all up in the Kool-Aid of others’?), documentaries on 50 Cent and Rush, more installments of Behind the Music, and a reality show about Eva Longoria-Parker‘s L.A. restaurant Beso.

– According to a Lady Gaga Tweet, she’ll be performing on American Idol on May 5.

– And NBC reportedly wanted the Website AshleyMadison.com – the Website that encourages infidelity – to advertise during Jerry Seinfeld‘s The Marriage Ref. It might sound outrageous initially, but this is a show where the likes of Madonna is giving marital advice, so … maybe kinda fitting.

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• Filed in American Idol, Betty White, Boob Tube to Big Screen, Daytime TV, Glee, Lost, Real Housewives, Saturday Night Live, TV News
• Tags: Betty White Jay-Z Saturday Night Live, Crystal Bowersox, Lost series finale, Mad Men season 4, Tori Spelling talk show