(ALL TIMES ET)

10PM | SHOWTIME – 7TH SEASON FINALE
Weeds – The season lost a little steam towards the end, but here’s hoping for a last-minute rebound as Nancy deals with the fact that one son, Silas, is not on her side, while the other, Shane, is trying to protect her from Detective Ouellette. And then there’s Doug, who’s desperately trying to keep his hedge fund scam going.

CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS FOR TIME AND CHANNEL | PBS – 42ND SEASON PREMIERE
Sesame Street – Science and technology are the themes for the new season, which will also include spoofs on Glee and The Deadliest Catch and guest stars like Robin Williams, Seth Rogen, Mila Kunis, John Krasinski, Joel McHale and Andy Samberg.

1PM | ABC – SERIES PREMIERE
The Chew – Mario Batali, Top Chef alum Carla Hall, What Not to Wear co-host Clinton Kelly and Food Network chef Michael Symon host this daily foodie show that replaces All My Children.

8PM | THE CW – 5TH SEASON PREMIERE
Gossip Girl – Serena makes a big boo-boo at her Hollywood job, and, while visiting her in Los Angeles, Nate meets an older woman (Elizabeth Hurley).

8PM | CBS
How I Met Your Mother – Ted tries to make nice with a girl he once cheated on, while Barney makes a bet with Marshall and Lily that may mean Marshall has to wear Barney’s ducky tie.

8PM | FOX – SERIES PREMIERE
Terra Nova – The sci-fi drama finds colonists (including Life on Mars star Jason O’Mara) travelling back to prehistoric times to create a new civilization because, well, their present one has become so miserable. Of course, they’re going to have to deal with dinosaurs that want to eat them, and a military-minded leader (Avatar‘s Stephen Lang) who wants them to fit neatly into his agenda. Yeah, I know, I can’t help but think Land of the Lost myself, but at least the special effects are less cheesy, as they should be considering Steven Spielberg is among the show’s producers. Bottom line: to watch or not to watch … yes, definitely worth checking out, but don’t set that season pass just yet.

9PM | THE CW – SERIES PREMIERE
Hart of Dixie – Rachel Bilson plays a heart surgeon who moves to a small town in Alabama to share a practice when she’s told she needs to work on her bedside manner. Lost you at “Rachel Bilson plays a heart surgeon,” didn’t I? The O.C. alum has her charms, but this show might not be the best use of them. Still, I’ll probably watch a couple more episodes, especially since equally charming Friday Night Lights alums Scott Porter and Cress Williams are in the cast.

9PM | BRAVO
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – It’s been all about Taylor so far this season, but the new chick enters the fray tonight when Kyle hosts a charity event and Brandi Glanville, the ex-Mrs. Eddie Cibrian, attends and immediately ruffles some feathers.

10PM | LOGO
The A-List: New York – Derek and the gang head to Atlantic City for Austin‘s bachelor party and Nyasha‘s concert.

10PM | ABC
Castle – Castle and Beckett are chasing a vigilante who may be responsible for murder and who also may be wearing a superhero costume while out doing his vigilante work.

10PM | CBS
Hawaii Five-O – So … that happened last week. Tonight, the action continues as McGarrett’s back in action, but the Governor assigns a new officer to keep an eye on McGarrett and the Five-0 team.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The jive and the quickstep are on tap for the contestants on tonight’s Dancing With the Stars (8PM, ABC);
– Eight more groups perform in the second part of the season premiere of The Sing-Off (8PM, NBC);
– The Bling Ring (9PM, Lifetime) is the Lifetime flick, starring Jennifer Grey, based on the true story of the group of teens who burglarized celebs’ homes in Hollywood in 2008 and 2009;
– The weekly four-ep It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia marathon on Comedy Central (9PM) includes the gang’s Lethal Weapon 5 flick;
– Season two of Mike & Molly (9:30PM, CBS) opens with Molly (awesome first time Emmy winner Melissa McCarthy) starting to plan her wedding to Mike;
– On Alphas (10PM, Syfy), season one wraps with Red Flag stepping up its war on the Department of Defense;
– On Cake Boss (10PM, TLC), Buddy bakes an edible chandelier cake that has to hang upside down;
– A Civil War drum is among the goodies brought into the store on back-to-back Pawn Star$ (10PM, History);
– On the season two finale of The Big C (10:30PM, Showtime), Cathy decides to do something special to ring in the New Year after Lee’s death;
– John-John finds out that one of his relatives is a zombie on Death Valley (10:30PM, MTV).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Kevin Hart, Neal Brennan and Taylor Lautner;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Ron Paul;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Radiohead;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Seth Rogen;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Ryan Gosling;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Dana Delany;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Elmo and Andy Samberg;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Jonah Hill;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): The Decemberists and David Guetta.

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• Filed in Daytime TV, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Late Night, Movies, Real Housewives, TV Marathon, TV Picks, Weeds
• Tags: Castle, Gossip Girl season 5, Hart of Dixie, Hawaii Five-0, How I Met Your Mother, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Sesame Street season 42, Terra Nova premiere, The A-List: New York, The Chew ABC, Weeds season finale

(ALL TIMES ET)

10PM, SUN | AMC
Breaking Bad – Damn, this show just gets better every week. In “Hermanos,” Walt realizes something shocking about Jesse, Hank asks for Walt’s help and, in one of the show’s all-time best sequences (which is saying a lot, obviously), we get some major insight into Gus (Giancarlo Esposito).

10PM, FRI | STARZ
Torchwood: Miracle Day – “The world is plunged into a recession” is today’s headline, er, the official description of tonight’s episode.

6PM, SUN | CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS
MDA Labor Day Telethon – That the MDA has ousted Jerry Lewis in what he had said would be his final hosting gig for the telethon? Shameful. But a lack of respect for all that Lewis has done to help the organization’s efforts – which includes helping to raise more than $2 billion in the last 50 years – doesn’t mean would-be donors shouldn’t continue to respect all the MDA has done for its beneficiaries.

9PM, SUN | DISCOVERY – SERIES PREMIERE
Dinosaur Revolution – The four-part series examines the evolution of dinosaurs, including the ones who made it the furthest through the evolutionary chain and, in a second episode on Sunday (10PM), how the dinos socialized.

9:30PM, SUN | CBS
The Good Wife: A New Beginning – To whet your appetite for the third season, which premieres on Sept. 25, The Good Wife‘s cast and producers discuss the show’s first two seasons and where the storylines are headed.

10PM, SUN | HBO
Curb Your Enthusiasm – Here it is, the “Mister Softee” episode, which reveals an incident from Larry’s early years that really explains a lot about why Larry is so … Larry. Also, Bill Buckner guest stars and, yes, his own traumatic experience from the past factors into the episode.

9PM, MON | TNT
The Closer – Brenda’s investigating the disappearance of a stage father when she gets some hopeful news and her civil suit.

9PM, MON | BRAVO – 2ND SEASON PREMIERE
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – After Russell Armstrong‘s shocking suicide, oh yeah, the show is definitely going to be kinda creepy now. Creepy enough to make it unwatchable? That remains to be seen.

10PM, MON | A&E – 2ND SEASON FINALE
The Glades – Two ex-cons take the hospital hostage, and Jim and Callie work together to capture the dudes and make sure everyone remains safe.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
FRIDAY
– Three-hour marathon of Chappelle’s Show on Comedy Central (Fri., 8PM);

SATURDAY
– The Brad Pitt/Will Ferrell/Tina Fey ‘toon Megamind makes its HBO debut (Sat., 8PM);
– On Doctor Who (Sat., 9PM, BBCA), The Doctor visits a boy who’s afraid of the monsters living in his bedroom;

SUNDAY
– Eviction nominees are revealed on Big Brother (Sun., 8PM, CBS);
– On Food Network Challenge (Sun., 8PM, Food Network), four pirates create extreme pirate-themed cakes;
– One crazy bride accuses her pregnant sister of trying to upstage her on Bridezillas (Sun., 9PM, WE);
– On Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew (Sun., 9PM, VH1), a season five wrap-up includes updates on the patients, including Amy Fisher, as well as the woman she infamously shot, Mary Jo Buttafuoco;
– Parker represents his ex in a case against an insurance company on Drop Dead Diva (Sun., 9PM, Lifetime);
– On Great Food Truck Race (Sun., 9PM, Food Network), the trucks head to Kansas State University, where they have to create five-dollar dishes and sell them to KSU students;
– Lisa and Maya help a stranded driver on Ice Road Truckers (Sun., 9PM, History);
– Sam gets even with Marcus on True Blood (Sun., 9PM, HBO);
– Eric and Melinda crash Sloan’s date on Entourage (Sun., 10:30PM, HBO);

MONDAY
– On Bachelor Pad (Mon., 8PM, ABC), the remaining contestants have to pair up and compete as couples;
– Two surprise guests arrive for a graduation party on the 4th season summer finale of The Secret Life of the American Teenager (Mon., 8PM, ABC Family);
– The weekly four-ep marathon of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia includes the gem “The D.E.N.N.I.S. System” (Mon., 9PM, Comedy Central);
– The death of a female dockworker may include mob connections and Maura’s biological dad on Rizzoli & Isles (Mon., 10PM, TNT);
– A vamp hooker gets out of jail and teen vigilantes are on the hunt for zombies on Death Valley (Mon., 10:30PM, MTV).

And the late-night line-up for Friday and Monday:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Norm MacDonald (REPEAT) (Monday);
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Anne Hathaway (REPEAT) (Monday);
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Jeff Bridges (REPEAT) (Monday);
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): James Franco (Friday); Emma Stone (REPEAT) (Monday);
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Andy Grammer and Dick Chaney (Friday); Jane Fonda (REPEAT) (Monday);
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Joel McHale (REPEAT) (Friday); Zoe Saldana and Anton Yelchin (REPEAT) (Monday);
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Jason Sudeikis (Friday); Steve Carell (REPEAT) (Monday);
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Peter Krause (Friday); Annie Duke and Julie Chen (Monday);
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): David Sirota (REPEAT) (Friday); Dan Harmon (REPEAT) (Monday).

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• Filed in Breaking Bad, Curb Your Enthusiasm, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Late Night, Real Housewives, TV Marathon, TV Picks
• Tags: Breaking Bad, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Dinosaur Revolution, MDA Telethon, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, The Closer, The Glades, The Good Wife: A New Beginning, Torchwood: Miracle Day

(ALL TIMES ET)

10:30PM | MTV
Death Valley – The New York Times described this new action/zombie/cop comedy as Reno 911! with zombies, and while I think nothing will ever live up to Lt. Dangle and the gang, Valley is laugh-out-loud funny, with a fun cast that includes comedian and Fat Actress alum Bryan Callen, Lost‘s Tania Raymond, The Bold and the Beautiful‘s Texas Battle and underrated Popular alum Bryce Johnson.

8PM | VH1 – SERIES PREMIERE
Basketball Wives: LA – Kimsha Artest and sisters Laura and Gloria Govan are among the stars of this spin-off of the original Basketball Wives reality series. Will this batch of women prove to be as interesting as the Miami Wives? Eh …

9PM | TNT
The Closer – Brenda asks Raydor for help with a case, as the squad members are deposed in the lawsuit against Brenda.

9PM | COMEDY CENTRAL
It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia – This week’s four-ep marathon includes “Paddy’s Pub: Home of the Original Kitten Mittens” (10:30PM), or kitten “mittons” as Charlie spells it, and “The Waitress Is Getting Married” (9PM), in which Charlie (Charlie Day), in his own weird, but still sweet, Charlie way, shows his love for The Waitress (Mary Elizabeth Ellis, the real-life Mrs. Charlie Day).

10PM | LOGO
The A-List: New York – Austin and Reichen become closer when everyone else washes their hands of Austin, but that creates new drama for Mr. Armacost, when Jake starts to feel left out.

10PM | SHOWTIME
Weeds – Nancy, Andy and Silas plot revenge against Emma (guest star Michelle Trachtenberg), while Doug deals with a financial situation that means he really needs to make his hedge fund work and Shane gets a little more involved with the law than he intended.

10:30PM | THE HUB
Happy Days – It’s the classic “Potsie Quits School” episode of Days, with Potsie’s “Pumps Your Blood” gem.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Place your Bachelor Pad (8PM, ABC) bets: Is it Jake or Kasey who leaves?;
– Carter and Allison wear memory-reading devices as a means of appealing the ruling on their relationship on Eureka (8PM, Syfy);
– New episodes of American Chopper: Senior vs. Junior (9PM, Discovery) kick off with the lawsuit between the Pauls getting settled;
– Fiona hopes Charlie will go to the prom with her on Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick);
– Pete and Claudia try to find Stukowski’s partner when Stukowski is interrogated by Warehouse agents on Warehouse 13 (9PM, Syfy);
– On Alphas (10PM, Syfy), Hicks and Nina hook up with a dangerous Alpha cult leader;
– CIA Confidential: 9/11 Mastermind (10PM, NGC) chronicles the CIA’s decade-long hunt for 9/11 planner Khalid Sheikh Mohammed;
– On Rizzoli & Isles (10PM, TNT), a man dies during what appears to be a mugging;
– Sean is annoyed by new neighbors and Adam goes to Poppy’s high school reunion on The Big C (10:30PM, Showtime).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Reese Witherspoon and Joseph Gordon-Levitt (REPEAT);
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Ali Velshi (REPEAT);
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): The Cars (REPEAT);
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Jason Sudeikis;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): David Koechner;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Aziz Ansari (REPEAT);
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Robert Duvall;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): William Shatner;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Walt Goggins (REPEAT).

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• Filed in It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Late Night, TV Marathon, TV Picks, Weeds
• Tags: Basketball Wives LA, Death Valley MTV, Happy Days Pumps Your Blood, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Kitten Mittens, The A-List: New York, The Closer, Weeds

(ALL TIMES ET)

10PM | SHOWTIME
Weeds – Her fellow housewives, drug lords and federal agents haven’t been able to keep up with Nancy (Mary-Louise Parker) and her clever ways, but she might have finally met her match in Zoya (Olga Sosnovska), her prison pal, whose surprise arrival in New York is going to throw everyone’s world into chaos. In tonight’s episode, Nancy and Andy (Justin Kirk) try to figure out how to keep Zoya from taking over the bike shop, while Silas (Hunter Parrish) is dealing with takeover attempts of his own and Doug (Kevin Nealon) tries to fend off the SEC.

8PM | VH1
Basketball Wives, Reunion Part 2 – John Salley continues to nudge to women into dishing some dirt on the recently-concluded third season, which, of course, leads to more squabbles, most of them involving Royce.

8PM | SYFY
Eureka – Carter (Colin Ferguson) and Allison (Salli Richardson-Whitfield) are the subject of a relationship audit by the Department of Defense.

9PM | TNT
The Closer – As Capt. Raydor (Mary McDonnell) pushes forward with her investigation of Brenda’s (Kyra Sedgwick) squad, her focus narrows in on Sanchez (Raymond Cruz).

9PM | SYFY
Warehouse 13 – When Myka (Joanne Kelly) hunts for the man who killed her old partner, her fellow Warehouse 13 agents think there may be a link between the murderer and the Secret Service.

10PM | LOGO
The A-List: New York – Ryan‘s runway show turns into another opportunity for a drama involving Austin, who has even bigger problems when most of his NYC pals turn against him.

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
The Best Thing I Ever Ate – Food Network personalities share their favorite childhood foods, including cotton candy, homemade pasta and Frito Pie.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Jake finds out he has more allies than Kasey and the nasty Vienna on Bachelor Pad (8PM, ABC);
– Back-to-back new eps of Hell’s Kitchen (8 and 9PM, Fox) result in the elimination of two more contestants;
– Amy is awaiting a marriage proposal from Ricky, who has other plans on Secret Life of the American Teenager (8PM, ABC Family);
– Alli plans to take things to a new level with Dave before summer break on Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick);
– The weekly four-ep marathon of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia (9PM, Comedy Central) includes “The Gang Hits the Road,” in which the Paddy’s crew tries to go to the Grand Canyon;
– The new reality series LaLa’s Full Court Life (9PM, VH1) revolves around La La Vazquez and NBA hubby Carmelo Anthony;
– The third season premiere of The T.O. Show (9:30PM, VH1) finds T.O. facing ACL surgery;
– The Alphas (10PM, Syfy) have to protect an inventor whose concoctions could be dangerous if the wrong people get their hands on them;
– The new reality series Bear Swamp Recovery (10PM, TruTV) follows a New Jersey family who operate a repo business;
– Rich people hiring hitmen is the subject of tonight’s Behind Mansion Walls (10PM, ID);
– Frankie’s ex returns to town with a big surprise on Rizzoli & Isles (10PM, TNT);
– On The Big C (10:30PM, Showtime), Rebecca’s miscarriage leads to a reunion for Cathy.

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Tom Hanks, Jack McBrayer and Soundgarden (REPEAT);
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Matt Long (REPEAT);
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Elliott Ackerman (REPEAT);
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Denis Leary;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Emma Stone and Adam Carolla (REPEAT);
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Aaron Paul and Roseanne Barr (REPEAT);
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Lou Dobbs and Cory Monteith (REPEAT);
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Hugh Laurie;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Adam Blackstone.

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• Filed in It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Late Night, TV Marathon, TV Picks, Weeds
• Tags: Basketball Wives, Eureka, Reunion Part 2, The A-List: New York, The Best Thing I Ever Ate, The Closer, Warehouse 13, Weeds

(ALL TIMES ET)

9PM | ABC FAMILY – SERIES PREMIERE
The Lying Game – Another series based on novels by Pretty Little Liars author Sara Shepherd, The Lying Game revolves around twins Emma and Sutton (As the World Turns alum Alexandra Chando). The twins meet for the first time, and foster teen Emma agrees to swap lives with rich kid Sutton, who wants to research the twins’ mother. But when Sutton goes MIA, Emma has to decide whether or not to continue the ruse (duh … there’d be no show if she didn’t). PS – Other stars of the series include Heroes alum Adrian Pasdar and The Office alum Andy “David Wallace” Buckley as Sutton’s dad, Ted.

8PM | VH1
Basketball Wives Reunion Part 1 – You know how the other women hated on Meeka Claxton most of the season? It continues at the reunion.

9PM | TNT
The Closer – Brenda considers hiring an attorney, but it’s Fritz who will have to make the financial sacrifices a high-priced lawyer will necessitate.

9PM | HBO
Gloria: In Her Own Words – Another fine entry in HBO’s summer documentary series, this profile of Gloria Steinem includes interviews with her, as she discusses her career as a journalist, her childhood and her role as an icon of the women’s lib movement of the ’70s.

9PM | FUSE
Top 100 Number Ones – Nick Cannon host this 10-part(!) countdown of hit songs of the 2000s. Hey man, Mariah’s blinged out Ring Pops don’t pay for themselves.

9PM | SYFY
Warehouse 13 – Fargo gets trapped inside a video game that was inspired by Warehouse 13. What a great idea for an actual videogame.

10PM | BRAVO – SERIES PREMIERE
Most Eligible Dallas – The network would have us believe this is the best thing to hit Bravo since Real Housewives. Let’s hope they mean Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and not the Miami or D.C. bunches.

10PM | MTV – 1ST SEASON FINALE
Teen Wolf – Scott has to rely on friends and enemies to try and stop the killings (and reunite with Allison).

10PM | SHOWTIME
Weeds – While Shane thrives in his new internship, Andy and Silas clash over how to run the bike shop/pot store and Nancy’s relationship with her supplier is, um, complicated by the arrival of her old cellmate.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Paint-soaked balls are thrown to see who gets eliminated from the Bachelor Pad (8PM, ABC), and guess who Vienna and Kasey target? Yes, of course, Jake;
– Carter talks to Allison about her mental condition on Eureka (8PM, Syfy);
– The top nine complete on Hell’s Kitchen (8PM, Fox);
– A voicemail stirs up drama between Amy and Ricky on Secret Life of the American Teenager (8PM, ABC Family);
– A stressed-out Drew becomes obsessed with his ultimate-fighting workouts on Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick);
– Tonight’s four-ep marathon of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia (9PM, Comedy Central) includes the classic “The Nightman Cometh” at 9:30PM;
– Patti Stanger returns for a 5th season of trying to kook up the lovelorn on Millionaire Matchmaker (9PM, Bravo);
– Oh, Austin … he and Derek seem destined to be enemies now (again) on The A-List: New York (10PM, Logo);
– Bill and Gary test their powers with a case outside the team on Alphas (10PM, Syfy);
– On Pawn Star$ (10 and 10:30PM, History), the big get is a pilot license signed by Orville Wright;
– Maura’s mama (guest star Jacqueline Bisset) visits on Rizzoli & Isles (10PM, TNT);
– Thanksgiving family dinner at Cathy’s house turns into a family drama on The Big C (10:30PM, Showtime) when Cathy reveals a big secret.

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Kathy Griffin;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Ali Velshi;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Susan Rice;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Harrison Ford (REPEAT);
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Train and Olivia Wilde (REPEAT);
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Betty White;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Mila Kunis (REPEAT);
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Betty White and Patton Oswalt (REPEAT);
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Shane Smith (REPEAT).

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• Filed in Betty White, Documentary, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Late Night, TV Marathon, TV Picks, Weeds
• Tags: Basketball Wives reunion, Gloria Steinem documentary, Most Eligible Dallas, Teen Wolf series premiere, The Closer, The Lying Game, Warehouse 13, Weeds