(ALL TIMES ET)
9PM | CURRENT – SERIES PREMIERE
50 Documentaries To See Before You Die – Super Size Me filmmaker Morgan Spurlock hosts this five-part series spotlighting the best documentaries made in the last 25 years, including, of course, Hoop Dreams, Exit Through the Gift Shop, Bowling for Columbine, The War Room and, kicking things off in tonight’s premiere, Seth Gordon‘s King of Kong: A Fist Full of Quarters.
9 and 9:30PM | A&E – 4TH SEASON PREMIERE
Billy the Exterminator – Billy hits the road this season, stopping first in Texas to track down an alligator hiding in a family’s yard, then heading off to Phoenix, where a family is being tormented by javelinas.
9PM | DISCOVERY – SHARK WEEK PREMIERE
Killer Sharks – The special examines how a series of shark attacks off the beaches of South Africa in 1957 helped shape how humans view our water-dwelling friends. Frienemies? Enemies? OK, those scary, sharp-toothed devils that scare the bejesus out of us.
10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Chopped – Chard and an “eight-armed ingredient” haunt the mystery baskets.
10PM | MTV
Teen Mom – Catelynn and Tyler come to the realization that their new freedom from their ‘rents is going to require them to get jobs. Maci and Ryan, meanwhile, fight about who gets Bentley for his birthday, while Amber melts down about being separated from Leah.
11PM | MTV
Awkward – Jenna assumes Matt wants to take their relationship public when he invites her to a party. Uh, wrong. But that’s okay … the soiree turns out to be a good opportunity for her to bond with Jake.
Worth flipping to during commercials:
- The bakers on Cupcake Wars (8PM, Food Network) compete to whip up treats for a Miss USA celebration;
- The top 12 compete on Hell’s Kitchen (8PM, Fox);
- Capt. Ahab (William Hurt) meets up with the whale on the conclusion of Moby Dick (8PM, Encore);
- Emily’s so stressed she ends up in the hospital on Pretty Little Liars (8PM, ABC Family);
- A retired rocker and a poker player are among the competitors on Wipeout (8PM, ABC);
- On Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick), both Anya and Fiona flirt with some dangerous drugs;
- On Memphis Beat (9PM, TNT), Dwight and Whitehead try to calm down a man who has taken hostages at a local bank because he claims he’s the victim of a scam;
- Annie has to tell the wife of one of her college professors (and a secret CIA agent) that the man was killed on Covert Affairs (10PM, USA);
- Interior designers Tanya McQueen and Tracy Hutson (wife of Samantha Who? and 7th Heaven star Barry Watson) star in the new reality series Picker Sisters (10PM, Lifetime), in which they travel around the country and scope out unique home furnishings.
And the late-night line-up:
- Conan (11PM, TBS): Shaquille O’Neal and Brian Posehn;
- The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Jason Bateman;
- The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Al Hunt;
- The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Ricky Gervais and Cat Deely;
- The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Katie Holmes;
- Lopez Tonight (Midnight, TBS): Kathy Griffin;
- Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Hank Azaria;
- Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Danny McBride;
- The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Kristen Bell;
- Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Dan Harmon (REPEAT).
All the tube news that’s fit to surf …
- FX is launching a new animated comedy that will spoof James Bond and other pop culture spies. Archer will premiere this fall, possibly with the new season of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.
- Kevin Bacon will direct an upcoming episode of wife Kyra Sedgwick‘s The Closer, which will also feature a guest appearance by the couple’s teen daughter, Sosie, who will play the niece of Sedgwick’s Brenda.
- Wings star Steven Weber may be headed back to the tube, in the Twins Peaks-ish midseason drama Happy Town.
- 1960s TV western Big Valley, which helped launch the careers of Lee Majors and Linda Evans, is the latest series headed to the big screen.
- Super Size Me director Morgan Spurlock talks about how he became involved with The Simpsons documentary that he’ll produce and direct to help celebrate the show’s 20th anniversary.
- Speaking of anniversaries, Sesame Street has been on the air for 40 years, and that’s a lot of Muppets. How many can you name? Can you name 101?
- Is the current line-up of reality series featuring plus-size Americans really dispelling myths, or are those shows perpetuating them?
- Showtime has great series like Nurse Jackie and Weeds, but their latest, the upcoming Shannon Elizabeth-hosted comedy/”Neo-burlesque” series Live Nude Comedy could not sound more boring.
- A former Baretta producer is suing ABC, claiming he actually created the series that became Lost, way back in 1977.
- And tonight in primetime:
- It’s the 80th Major League Baseball All-Star Game, live from St. Louis (8PM ET, Fox)
- Bianca tries to ingratiate herself to Chastity with a carnation sale on 10 Things I Hate About You (8PM, ABC Family)
- The first Power of Veto competition unfolds on Big Brother 11 (9PM, CBS)
- ABC has another delightful new episode of Better Off Ted (9PM)
- PC acts like a creep. Again. On NYC Prep (9PM, Bravo)
- A tired crew leads to mistakes on Deadliest Catch (9PM, Discovery)
- New Hawthorne on TNT (9PM)
- Bravo has collected the most unlikable people in all of Miami and put them together in a new reality series called Miami Social (10PM)
- Mayim “Blossom” Bialik guest stars on Saving Grace (10PM, TNT)
- William helps a whole family of addicts on The Cleaner (10PM, A&E)
- Sean gets out of the hospital with a new lease on life on Rescue Me (10PM, FX)
- Oxygen’s 25iest counts down the 25, uh, coolest (?) “Celeb-U-Tots” (11PM)
Charlie Sheen, Russell Brand and Louis C.K. are getting most of the attention, but I’m most excited that one of the best new shows of last TV season — Wilfred – returns for its second season on FX tonight (10PM ET). Season one of the series ended with a cliffhanger — had Ryan (Elijah Wood) [...]
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