(ALL TIMES ET)

9PM | USA
Royal Pains – Hank has his hands full, first with a marathon runner whose body temperature if off, and then with Boris, whose declining health sends Hank into investigative mode.

8PM | ANIMAL PLANET
Bedbug Apocalypse – This special examines those creepy crawlies that have caused such a ruckus around the U.S. in the last year.

8PM | BIO
Dances With Wolves: The Inside Story – Director and star Kevin Costner discusses his Oscar-winning 1990 classic movie.

8PM | CMT
To the Mat – CMT gets into the original movie biz with this entry, starring Ricky (The Ricker!) Schroder as a former wrestler who partners with a Wall Street consultant to save his family business, a wrestling school.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The Power of Veto competition is held on Big Brother (8PM, CBS);
– Mike and Lonnie threaten to kick Ashley and Juicy off Famous Food (8PM, VH1);
– Eli stops taking his meds again and becomes convinced he’s going to get back together with Claire on Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick);
– On the first season finale of Hollywood Hi-Tech (9:30PM, DIY), Adam Corolla‘s podcast studio gets an update, with new Webcams, state-of-the-art microphones and speakers in the waiting room;
– It’s Johnny and Tyler vs. CT and Adam in the final men’s Jungle on The Challenge: Rivals (10PM, MTV);
– Patty gets a surprise visit from her son Michael on Damages (10PM, DirecTV);
– Huey Lewis and Buck Henry guest star on Hot in Cleveland (10PM, TV Land);
– The second season of Outrageous Kid Parties (10PM, TLC) kicks off with a “candy fantasy” party for a preschooler’s graduation party;
– Sheila makes Colleen an offer she can’t refuse on Rescue Me (10PM, FX);
– The first season finale of Rocco’s Dinner Party (10PM, Bravo) also serves as a birthday soiree for Liza Minnelli;
– Barry finds some interesting military items and Darrell finally gets a locker on back-to-back Storage Wars episodes (10 and 10:30PM, A&E).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Paul Rudd;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Michael Steele;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Jeff Bridges;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Bono and The Edge (REPEAT);
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Jason Sudeikis and Adam Levine (REPEAT);
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Joel McHale;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Ryan Gosling and Andy Cohen (REPEAT);
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): David Beckham (REPEAT);
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Raphael Saadiq (REPEAT).

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(ALL TIMES ET)

10:30PM | COMEDY CENTRAL – 1ST SEASON FINALE
Jon Benjamin Has a Van – Bob Odenkirk guest stars as a cult leader who crosses paths with Jon when Jon does a report on a religious sect that believes as one of its core tenants that Jesus smoked a pipe. Guess who picks up that habit himself, then?

9PM | USA
Royal Pains – Matt Lauer makes a cameo as Evan gets Hank an appearance on the Today show, without realizing that his bro has a major fear about public speaking.

9 and 9:30PM | LIFETIME
Roseanne’s Nuts – Roseanne‘s pals Phyllis Diller and Sandra Bernhard visit her in Hawaii, and a girls night out leads to a wicked hangover for Roseanne.

10PM | DIRECTV
Damages – In tonight’s installment, titled “We’ll Just Have to Find Another Way to Cut the Balls Off This Thing,” Patty hires a nurse to look after Catherine, while Ellen continues to battle Erickson (John Goodman) in court, which is made so much more difficult when Boorman (Dylan Baker) messes with her witness’ credibility.

10PM | FX
Rescue Me – Tommy and the gang try to cut reporter Pam Keppler off with a dose of her own medicine, while Sean works up the nerve to talk to Emily about their odor problem.

10 and 10:30PM | A&E
Storage Wars – Yeeeeeep, it’s true: Dave Hester faces his rival bidder at an auction in Mission Hills, California.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The Power of Veto competition is held on Big Brother (8PM, CBS);
– The whole team turns against Danielle on Famous Food (8PM, VH1);
– The final four perform on part one of the season 8 finale of So You Think You Can Dance (8PM, Fox);
– An accident could result in Jenna losing custody of her baby on Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick);
– Oliver Stone‘s living room is transformed into a screening room on Hollywood Hi-Tech (9:30PM, DIY);
– On The Challenge: Rivals (10PM, MTV), Wes and Paula attack Cara Maria, and Laurel steps in to defend her;
– Primetime Nightline: Celebrity Secrets (10PM, ABC) covers the impact of being in showbiz on kids, including Rebecca Black and Eden Wood.

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Aziz Ansari;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): John Coffee;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Elliott Ackerman;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Shia LaBeouf (REPEAT);
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Joel McHale;
– Lopez Tonight (Midnight, TBS): David Koechner and Jessica Alba;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Jesse Eisenberg, Incubus and Jerry Springer;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Snooki;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Howie Mandel (REPEAT);
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Ben Schwartz (REPEAT).

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• Tags: Damages, Jon Benjamin Has a Van season finale, Rescue Me, Roseanne's Nuts, Royal Pains, Storage Wars

(ALL TIMES ET)

9PM | TNT – 1ST SEASON FINALE
Franklin & Bash – The show’s already been renewed for a second season, but it sounds like producers saved the best for last this season, as Danny Trejo guest stars as a wrestler who takes legal action when he’s fired being too old, and Tricia Helfer pops in as a top attorney who teams with Franklin and Bash on a murder case.

9PM | TEENNICK
Degrassi – Clare wants to get closer to Jake, but he’s not looking for a committed thang.

9PM | DISCOVERY – SHARK WEEK PREMIERE
How Sharks Hunt – If you’re about to be chomped by a shark, you probably don’t care what their killing techniques are. But knowing their crafty little ways ahead of time might help prevent an attack from ever happening, so … just watch, m’kay?

9PM | USA
Royal Pains – Paige says yes to Evan, but tells him he needs the General’s official stamp of approval.

10PM | DIRECTV
Damages – Patty’s old mentor, Bill Herndon (guest star Judd Hirsch) helps her get some info on Erickson (John Goodman), while Boorman tries to track down Ellen’s new witness.

10PM | FX
Rescue Me – Lou takes his diet seriously: He begins reading a book called The Celery Bible. Meanwhile, Sean goes out with the bridal shop woman, and has a great evening … until a really bad smell makes it a big stinker.

10 and 10:30PM | TRAVEL – SERIES PREMIERE
Truck Stop, Missouri – In honor of my brother, who is a truck driver in Missouri, this reality show, which follows the “colorful characters” who pass through the Midway Auto Truck Plaza in Columbia, Mo., is worth a look. In the back-to-back premiere episodes, a diner at the stop launches “The Big 70” eating challenge and a grandma who’s sporting lots of tattoos visits.

10:30PM | COMEDY CENTRAL
Jon Benjamin Has a Van – Patton Oswalt guest stars as a successful Broadway producer interviewed by Jon, while David Cross is Jon’s friend, who takes a little tour of NYC with the Archer star.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The Power of Veto competition unfolds on Big Brother (8PM, CBS);
– Christina Applegate guest judges So You Think You Can Dance (8PM, Fox);
– Roseanne invites celebrity pals to join her for Passover dinner on Roseanne’s Nuts (9PM, Lifetime);
– Patrick “David Puddy” Warburton has the barn on his property renovated into a concert hall on Hollywood Hi-Tech (9:30PM, DIY);
– A surprise twist changes the game and strategies on The Challenge: Rivals (10PM, MTV);
– Chef Robert has to insist upon a new chef and a big makeover to help save an English-style pub in Indianapolis on Restaurant: Impossible (10PM, Food Network);
– Dave Hester (yeeeep!) reunites with his estranged brother on tonight’s Storage Wars (10 and 10:30PM, A&E).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Olivia Wilde;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Austan Goolsbee;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Robert Wittman;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Emma Stone;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Jeremy Piven and Kelly Osbourne;
– Lopez Tonight (Midnight, TBS): Matt Nathanson and Adrian Grenier;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): James Franco and Coldplay;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Jason Bateman;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Craig tours the Louvre;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Yelawolf (REPEAT).

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• Tags: Damages, Degrassi, Franklin & Bash season finale, Jon Benjamin Has a Van, Royal Pains, Shark Week, Truck Stop Missouri

(ALL TIMES ET)

9PM | USA
Royal Pains – Evan spends time with his grandfather (guest star Ed Asner) in hopes of helping Eddie’s (Henry Winkler) parole case, but he finds out the surprising real reason why his grandpa has been MIA from his life.

9PM | SCIENCE CHANNEL – SERIES PREMIERE
Wonders of the World – This new documentary series examining the atomic link between humanity and the universe is hosted by rocker/physicist Brian Cox.

9:30PM | DIY
Hollywood Hi-Tech – This will spark some home makeover envy: Nancy O’Dell gets a new family room with a 100-inch TV screen, five surround-sound speakers, cool new chairs and a love seat.

10PM | DIRECTV
Damages – Ellen’s case against Erickson (John Goodman) depends on soldier-turned-Erickson employee Chris Sanchez (Chris Messina), who’s in more than a little bit of danger because of it.

10PM | E!
E! True Hollywood Story: Snooki – I know, when you see the title of this entry in E!’s series, you think it’s a spoof, right? But it’s real … all too real.

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Restaurant: Impossible – Chef Robert tries to help Virginia diner owners who are on the verge of bankruptcy because of mismanagement and a major issue with cleanliness.

10 and 10:30PM | A&E
Storage Wars – Laura fills in for sick auctioneer Dan, while the lockers she’s trying to unload include electronics and a cool movie prop.

10:30PM | COMEDY CENTRAL
Jon Benjamin Has a Van – Jon’s undercover assignment: Robbing a store. That sells surveillance equipment.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The Power of Veto competition happens on Big Brother (8PM, CBS);
– On Famous Food (8PM, VH1), Ashley fights with DJ Paul, Jake fights with Danielle and the whole gang has a run-in with designer Scott;
– Lady Gaga is a guest judge on So You Think You Can Dance (8PM, Fox);
– While working on the school play, Eli thinks he’s found a new love interest on Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick);
– James Van Der Beek guests as Janie’s fiancé (who’s in need of legal assistance after his bachelor party) on Franklin & Bash (9PM, TNT);
– Meat America (9PM, History) is a two-hour special on the history of beef, pork and chicken;
– On Roseanne’s Nuts (9 and 9:30PM, Lifetime), Roseanne takes surfing lessons and tries to prove to the locals that her Hawaiian museum is not haunted;
– Evan plots (again) to get rid of CT, who finds himself in a love triangle with Laurel and Mandi on The Challenge: Rivals (10PM, MTV);
– Jennifer Love Hewitt guest stars as Victoria’s daughter Emmy on Hot in Cleveland (10PM, TV Land);
– Tommy decides to give an interview for the 9/11 documentary on Rescue Me (10PM, FX);
– Cat Deeley and Raven-Symone are among the dinner guests on Rocco’s Dinner Party (10PM, Bravo).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Kevin Connolly;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Rachel Weisz;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Mary Cummings;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Craig Ferguson;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Vanessa Carlton and Chris Tucker;
– Lopez Tonight (Midnight, TBS): The Miz and Kate Walsh;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Olivia Wilde;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Neil Patrick Harris;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Mary McCormack;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Lykke Li (REPEAT).

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• Tags: Damages, E! True Hollywood Story: Snooki, Jon Benjamin Has a Van, Restaurant: Impossible, Royal Pains, Storage Wars, Wonders of the World Brian Cox

(ALL TIMES ET)

10PM | A&E – 2ND SEASON PREMIERE
Storage Wars – Back-to-back episodes kick off the surprise hit’s second season, which includes bespectacled Barry taking a member of Aerosmith to an auction. I loved the show in its first season, so here’s hoping it hasn’t lost its charms now that the “stars” of the show are, well, stars. Reality TV stars, but still.

9PM | LIFETIME
Roseanne’s Nuts – Roseanne gets another shot at the national anthem – remember her last one? – for a local softball game in Hawaii.

9PM | USA
Royal Pains – Hank and Evan head to Florida for Eddie’s (Henry Winkler) parole hearing. Free Fonzie!

9:30PM | DIY – SERIES PREMIERE
Hollywood Hi-Tech – The new series chronicles techie renovations in celeb homes. First up: Entourage star Kevin Connolly and his cool home theater, with raised seating, an HD projector and a 110-inch screen.

10PM | FX
Rescue Me – Lou faces the big FDNY physical, while Tommy faces – not well – the news that Jimmy is featured in a 9/11 documentary. Meanwhile, anyone but me wishing the show had ended when Uncle Teddy shot Tommy in the bar at the end of season five? Wouldn’t that have been the perfect ending to the series? This season … chipping away at what has been, at times, a really terrific show.

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Restaurant: Impossible – Chef Robert Irvine tries to help a sweet little South Carolina restaurant called Sweet Tea. The name alone would make me try it at least once.

10PM | TRUTV – SERIES PREMIERE
South Beach Tow – The newly-single Jennifer Lopez is a producer on this new reality series, which follows a family who runs a tow-truck business in Florida.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Famous Food (8PM, VH1) moves to Wednesday night, and in spite of my better judgment, I’m probably gonna TiVo it;
– Anya celebrates her 18th birthday on Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick);
– Kathy Najimy guest stars as a judge who put Franklin & Bash (9PM, TNT) on house arrest because of their courtroom antics;
– New Damages on DirecTV (10PM);
– Doris Roberts guest stars as Elka’s rival on Hot in Cleveland (10PM, TV Land);
– Adam tries to hook up with Jenn on Real World/Road Rules: The Challenge: Rivals (10PM, MTV);
– Michael Ian Black and S. Epatha Merkerson are among the guests at Rocco’s Dinner Party (10PM, Bravo);
– On Who the (Bleep) Did I Marry? (10PM, ID), a wife finds out her cop spouse is a serial rapist;
– Andy Richter guests on Jon Benjamin Has a Van (10:30PM, Comedy Central).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Justin Timberlake;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Steve Carell;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Michael Sandel;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Jeremy Piven and Cee-Lo Green;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Daniel Craig and Gavin DeGraw;
– Lopez Tonight (Midnight, TBS): Michael Rapaport;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): John Stamos and Owl City;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Ryan Gosling and Andy Cohen;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Breckin Meyer;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Janelle Monae (REPEAT).

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• Filed in Late Night, Reality, TV Picks
• Tags: Hollywood Hi-Tech, Rescue Me, Restaurant: Impossible, Roseanne's Nuts, Royal Pains, South Beach Tow, Storage Wars season 2