Shark Week 2015 marks the 28th anniversary of the annual celebration of and fascination with all things shark-y. Because there ain’t no party like a Shark Week party, a round-up of this year’s best shark-themed goodies, suitable for any shark soiree:

Shark Week Sunglasses by Knockaround ($35)

Gotta keep those peepers nice and protected, all the better to spot sharks with.

“I Love Shark Week’ Beach Ball at Discovery Store.com ($7.95)

The perfect pool party plaything.

Shark Week Hooded Towel Wrap at Target ($15.49)

The perfect post-pool party plush.

Shark Attack Bowl at DiscoveryStore.com ($17.95)

The perfect salsa dish, and just menacing enough to ward off the would-be double dippers.

Shark Week Chomp Mug at DiscoveryStore.com ($17.95)

For taking a bite out of Shark Week … and washing it down with a refreshing beverage.

Sharkopedia at DiscoveryStore.com ($19.99)

The subtitle says it all: “The Complete Guide to Everything Shark.”

Shark Shower Curtain at Target ($19.99)

Yeah, so this one isn’t really a party thang, unless you have some guests with the habit of getting overly familiar with your shower. But it’ll look cool hanging in the lavatory for those important party potty breaks.

LUSH Shark Fin Soap at LUSHusa.com ($5.95)

So, if you’re gonna trick out the bathroom, may as well have this cool soap on the sink, too.

Shark Week’s First-Ever Official Great White Shark Coin at StarShop.com ($199)

Too expensive to be a party favor, but the limited edition silver dollar (only 10,000 minted) makes a very cool and unique Shark Week lover gift.

Shark Week Cutout Standee at DiscoveryStore.com ($39.95)

Selfies are much better taken with the cardboard version than the real thing.

Shark Week 2015 begins July 5 at 8 PM ET on Discovery

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(ALL TIMES ET)

10PM | MTV – 4TH SEASON PREMIERE
Jersey Shore – The network is promising that the new season’s new hookups are going to prove to be more shocking than the culture differences Snooki and the gang experience when they head to Florence, Italy. But honestly … whatever guilty, guilty pleasure we may still be able to wring out of watching these idiots continue to kill off their brain cells, do you really think you could be shocked by anything they do at this point?

9PM | USA
Burn Notice – While Fi and Jesse keep their eye on a guy who may be the answer to solving the mystery of Max’s murder, Michael and Sam try to rescue a sick boy from his father, who’s hidden him away at an armed compound.

9PM | LIFETIME
Project Runway – The designers have to use items they find in a pet store to whip up some – wait for it – fetching outfits.

9PM | DISCOVERY – SHARK WEEK PREMIERE
Shark City – Shark Week host Andy Samberg provides commentary during this special, which tracks sharks in the Bahamas to see how they spend their days and nights.

10PM | COMEDY CENTRAL
Futurama – Let other networks hunt sharks … Leela’s obsessed with tracking down a four-dimensional space whale.

10PM | DISCOVERY – SHARK WEEK PREMIERE
When Fish Attack 3 – By “fish,” they really mean giant people-chomping whales.

10PM | FX
Wilfred – The episode’s called “Pride,” but it’s also all about love, as Wilfred pursues his new puppy love interest and Jane Kaczmarek plays a woman with a thang for Ryan.

11:59PM | ADULT SWIM
Childrens Hospital – Alicia Silverstone guest stars as Owen’s secret wife. Who’s not such a secret any more.

12:15AM FRIDAY | ADULT SWIM
NTSF:SD:SUV – Trent’s (Paul Scheer) ex returns a changed person … literally. Meanwhile, no one reads the book Piper has selected for the book club.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Ryan Reynolds and Jason Bateman visit The View (11AM, ABC);
– The final six is cut to a final four on So You Think You Can Dance (8PM, Fox);
– As if the challenges weren’t, uh, challenging enough, tonight’s Wipeout (8PM, ABC) finds the contestants being forced to wear potato sacks during the game;
– It’s eviction night on Big Brother (9PM, CBS);
– On Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick), Drew wants to return to his old school, but he’s afraid to leave Adam behind;
– It’s the Happy Days episode (10PM, The Hub) that introduces Robin Williams as Mork from Ork;
– On Suits (10PM, USA), Harvey’s past with another attorney may hurt his current project, fostering the merger of two hotel chains;
– Dane Cook and Bob Saget guest star as themselves on Louie (10:30PM, FX).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Jason Bateman;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Dick Durbin;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Anthony Bourdain;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Colin Farrell;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Roseanne Barr and Jason Momoa;
– Lopez Tonight (Midnight, TBS): Nicole Scherzinger and Hank Azaria;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Jeremy Piven and Denise Richards;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Ryan Reynolds and Fountains of Wayne;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Craig visits the Palace of Versailles;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Matt & Kim.

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• Tags: Burn Notice, Childrens Hospital, Futurama, Jersey Shore Italy, Jersey Shore season 4 premiere, NTSF:SD:SUV, Project Runway, Shark Week, Wilfred

(ALL TIMES ET)

9PM | TNT – 1ST SEASON FINALE
Franklin & Bash – The show’s already been renewed for a second season, but it sounds like producers saved the best for last this season, as Danny Trejo guest stars as a wrestler who takes legal action when he’s fired being too old, and Tricia Helfer pops in as a top attorney who teams with Franklin and Bash on a murder case.

9PM | TEENNICK
Degrassi – Clare wants to get closer to Jake, but he’s not looking for a committed thang.

9PM | DISCOVERY – SHARK WEEK PREMIERE
How Sharks Hunt – If you’re about to be chomped by a shark, you probably don’t care what their killing techniques are. But knowing their crafty little ways ahead of time might help prevent an attack from ever happening, so … just watch, m’kay?

9PM | USA
Royal Pains – Paige says yes to Evan, but tells him he needs the General’s official stamp of approval.

10PM | DIRECTV
Damages – Patty’s old mentor, Bill Herndon (guest star Judd Hirsch) helps her get some info on Erickson (John Goodman), while Boorman tries to track down Ellen’s new witness.

10PM | FX
Rescue Me – Lou takes his diet seriously: He begins reading a book called The Celery Bible. Meanwhile, Sean goes out with the bridal shop woman, and has a great evening … until a really bad smell makes it a big stinker.

10 and 10:30PM | TRAVEL – SERIES PREMIERE
Truck Stop, Missouri – In honor of my brother, who is a truck driver in Missouri, this reality show, which follows the “colorful characters” who pass through the Midway Auto Truck Plaza in Columbia, Mo., is worth a look. In the back-to-back premiere episodes, a diner at the stop launches “The Big 70” eating challenge and a grandma who’s sporting lots of tattoos visits.

10:30PM | COMEDY CENTRAL
Jon Benjamin Has a Van – Patton Oswalt guest stars as a successful Broadway producer interviewed by Jon, while David Cross is Jon’s friend, who takes a little tour of NYC with the Archer star.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The Power of Veto competition unfolds on Big Brother (8PM, CBS);
– Christina Applegate guest judges So You Think You Can Dance (8PM, Fox);
– Roseanne invites celebrity pals to join her for Passover dinner on Roseanne’s Nuts (9PM, Lifetime);
– Patrick “David Puddy” Warburton has the barn on his property renovated into a concert hall on Hollywood Hi-Tech (9:30PM, DIY);
– A surprise twist changes the game and strategies on The Challenge: Rivals (10PM, MTV);
– Chef Robert has to insist upon a new chef and a big makeover to help save an English-style pub in Indianapolis on Restaurant: Impossible (10PM, Food Network);
– Dave Hester (yeeeep!) reunites with his estranged brother on tonight’s Storage Wars (10 and 10:30PM, A&E).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Olivia Wilde;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Austan Goolsbee;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Robert Wittman;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Emma Stone;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Jeremy Piven and Kelly Osbourne;
– Lopez Tonight (Midnight, TBS): Matt Nathanson and Adrian Grenier;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): James Franco and Coldplay;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Jason Bateman;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Craig tours the Louvre;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Yelawolf (REPEAT).

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(ALL TIMES ET)

9PM | CURRENT  – SERIES PREMIERE
50 Documentaries To See Before You Die – Super Size Me filmmaker Morgan Spurlock hosts this five-part series spotlighting the best documentaries made in the last 25 years, including, of course, Hoop Dreams, Exit Through the Gift Shop, Bowling for Columbine, The War Room and, kicking things off in tonight’s premiere, Seth Gordon‘s King of Kong: A Fist Full of Quarters.

9 and 9:30PM | A&E – 4TH SEASON PREMIERE
Billy the Exterminator – Billy hits the road this season, stopping first in Texas to track down an alligator hiding in a family’s yard, then heading off to Phoenix, where a family is being tormented by javelinas.

9PM | DISCOVERY – SHARK WEEK PREMIERE
Killer Sharks – The special examines how a series of shark attacks off the beaches of South Africa in 1957 helped shape how humans view our water-dwelling friends. Frienemies? Enemies? OK, those scary, sharp-toothed devils that scare the bejesus out of us.

9PM | USA
White Collar – Eliza Dushku guest stars as an Egyptologist who goes undercover with Neal to investigate Matthew Keller, who ends up revealing his true motive for being in New York to Neal.

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Chopped – Chard and an “eight-armed ingredient” haunt the mystery baskets.

10PM | MTV
Teen Mom – Catelynn and Tyler come to the realization that their new freedom from their ‘rents is going to require them to get jobs. Maci and Ryan, meanwhile, fight about who gets Bentley for his birthday, while Amber melts down about being separated from Leah.

11PM | MTV
Awkward – Jenna assumes Matt wants to take their relationship public when he invites her to a party. Uh, wrong. But that’s okay … the soiree turns out to be a good opportunity for her to bond with Jake.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The bakers on Cupcake Wars (8PM, Food Network) compete to whip up treats for a Miss USA celebration;
– The top 12 compete on Hell’s Kitchen (8PM, Fox);
– Capt. Ahab (William Hurt) meets up with the whale on the conclusion of Moby Dick (8PM, Encore);
– Emily’s so stressed she ends up in the hospital on Pretty Little Liars (8PM, ABC Family);
– A retired rocker and a poker player are among the competitors on Wipeout (8PM, ABC);
– On Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick), both Anya and Fiona flirt with some dangerous drugs;
– On Memphis Beat (9PM, TNT), Dwight and Whitehead try to calm down a man who has taken hostages at a local bank because he claims he’s the victim of a scam;
– Annie has to tell the wife of one of her college professors (and a secret CIA agent) that the man was killed on Covert Affairs (10PM, USA);
– Interior designers Tanya McQueen and Tracy Hutson (wife of Samantha Who? and 7th Heaven star Barry Watson) star in the new reality series Picker Sisters (10PM, Lifetime), in which they travel around the country and scope out unique home furnishings.

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Shaquille O’Neal and Brian Posehn;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Jason Bateman;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Al Hunt;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Ricky Gervais and Cat Deely;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Katie Holmes;
– Lopez Tonight (Midnight, TBS): Kathy Griffin;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Hank Azaria;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Danny McBride;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Kristen Bell;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Dan Harmon (REPEAT).

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• Filed in Documentary, Late Night, Movies, Teen Mom, TV Picks
• Tags: 50 Documentaries To See Before You Die, Awkward MTV, Billy the Exterminator season 4, Chopped, Morgan Spurlock, Shark Week, Teen Mom, White Collar

(ALL TIMES ET)

10-11:30PM | THE HUB
Jump the Shark Night – Here it is, the three-part Happy Days episode that launched a pop culture phenomenon. In the “Hollywood” episodes, The Fonz (Henry Winkler) heads to California to become a big star, but he’s nearly tripped up by that iconic water ski jump over a shark. Kudos to The Hub for scheduling the perfect mini-event to coincide with sister network Discovery Channel’s Shark Week!

Five quick facts about the “Hollywood” episodes:
1 – They kicked off Happy Days‘ fifth season;
2 – Bonanza and Battlestar Galactica star Lorne Greene (the original Commander Adama!) makes a cameo appearance in “Hollywood”;
3 – Part 1 of the “Hollywood” storyline introduces Scott Baio as The Fonz’s cousin, Chachi Arcola (Wa wa wa!);
4 – Fonzie’s obnoxious foe, the one who challenges him to jump the shark: The California Kid, played by actor James Daughton, who would go on to play obnoxious Omega House president Gregory Marmalard in Animal House;
5 – Good sport Henry Winkler, while guest-starring on Happy Days pal Ron Howard‘s Arrested Development, poked fun at his “jumping the shark” moment by actually jumping over a dead shark.

PS – That Fonzie jumping-the-shark toy in the photo? You can get it here.

6AM | TCM
Summer Under the Stars – TCM’s annual Summer Under the Stars month-long event (in which a different star’s films are highlighted each day) starts this year with the movies of Marlon Brando.

8PM | ABC – 7TH SEASON FINALE
The Bachelorette – Fair warning: three hours (two-hour finale plus the After the Final Rose wrap-up) straight of this sniveling Bachelorette and her dudes is gonna take out more than a few brain cells. But if you’ve been watching this far, you kinda have to see it through to the end, right?

8PM | AMC
Mob Week – Former New York City mayor Rudy Giuliani, who knows a thing or two about taking on the mafia, hosts this week-long marathon of great mob-themed movies, starting with the greatest one of all, hands down, The Godfather, and continuing with The Godfather II (Aug. 2, 8PM); The Untouchables (Aug. 3, 8PM); and GoodFellas (Aug. 6, 8PM).

8PM | ENCORE – MINISERIES PREMIERE
Moby Dick – This two-night miniseries (it concludes tomorrow night at 8PM), premieres on what would have been author Herman Melville‘s 192nd birthday … so, Happy Birthday, dude. The stellar cast in this adaptation of Melville’s 1851 classic includes William Hurt as captain Ahab, Ethan Hawke as Starbuck, Gillian Anderson as Mrs. Ahab and Donald Sutherland as Father Mapple.

9PM | TNT
The Closer – Capt. Raydor (guest star Mary McDonnell) continues her audit, which leads to a recommendation Brenda is not going to like.

9PM | DISCOVERY – SHARK WEEK PREMIERE
Rogue Sharks – A rundown of historic shark attacks provides a look at whether or not sharks deliberately stalk humans as their snacks.

9PM | SYFY
Warehouse 13 – Pete’s (Eddie McClintock) ex-wife (who may or may not looks exactly like Jeri Ryan) shows up with plans to get remarried (not to him, no worries Pete and Myka fans), but an artifact may put a dent in her nuptial plans.

10PM | LOGO
The A-List – Austin tries to prove he’s not an embarrassing lush by, of course, throwing a cocktail party. I love this show so, so much, and yes, am completely aware that that thing about the brain cells dying also applies here.

10PM | BRAVO
Real Housewives of New York City Reunion, Part 2 – The throwdown continues as Andy Cohen hosts the second half of the season four reunion, in which Jill, Ramona, Alex and the gang continue to snipe at each other about the many ways  they wronged each other in the just-concluded season.

10PM | DISCOVERY – SHARK WEEK PREMIERE
Summer of the Shark – 2009 was not a good time to be hanging out at the beaches off Australia, unless perhaps you enjoyed the possibility of being attacked by a shark.

10PM | SHOWTIME
Weeds – When Nancy Met Heylia (again) … it’s not a happy reunion, let’s just say.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Star Jones‘ ex, Al Reynolds, inserts himself into Basketball Wives (8PM, VH1) again, as he sets up Jen on a blind date;
– On Eureka (8PM, Syfy), Carter has to solve a bank robbery, lest the town float away;
– The competition is down to 13 on Hell’s Kitchen (8M, Fox);
– Amy uncovers Adrian’s scheme on Secret Life of the American Teenager (8PM, ABC Family);
– Season 7 of The Bad Girls Club kicks off in New Orleans (9PM, Oxygen);
– Buddy bakes a cow cake on Cake Boss (9PM, TLC);
– On Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick), Anya continues to make bad boy choices;
– It’s the weekly four-episode marathon of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia on Comedy Central (9PM);
– Rosen and the tea, meet an autistic woman who may help them thwart a terrorist attack on Alphas (10PM, Syfy);
– Ronald Reagan‘s high school yearbook is among the goodies on back-to-back Pawn Star$ (10 and 10:30PM, History);
– Awesome 24 alum Annie Wersching guest stars on Rizzoli & Isles (10PM, TNT);
– Adam’s actions jeopardize Cathy’s new gig on The Big C (10:30PM, Showtime).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Harrison Ford;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Freida Pinto;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Tony Hsieh;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): James Franco;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Ryan Reynolds, Sheryl Crow and Matt Nathanson;
– Lopez Tonight (Midnight, TBS): Aaron Paul, Jon Favreau and Colbie Cailat;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Howie Mandel;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Lou Dobbs and Cory Monteith;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Ferguson is in Paris all week, and tonight, tours the Eiffel Tower;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Paul Feig (REPEAT).

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• Tags: AMC Mob Week, Happy Days jump the shark, Mob Week Rudy Giuliani, Moby Dick Encore, Moby Dick miniseries, Real Housewives of New York City reunion, Shark Week, TCM Summer Under the Stars, The A-List, The Bachelorette season finale, The Fonz jump the shark