(ALL TIMES ET)

10PM | CBS
Blue Bloods – Someone’s staring down the business end of a beatdown when Frank is the target of an assassination attempt, and detective son Danny goes looking for the perp to a) administer the aforementioned beatdown and b) determine if Frank was a random target or if the baddie intended to kill the NYPD Commissioner.

8PM | FOX
Kitchen Nightmares – Chef Gordo visits the Grasshopper Also Irish pub in New Jersey.

8PM | THE CW
Smallville – Still giddy about the news that Michael Rosenbaum will return for the May 13 series finale? Another fan-pleasing event: Tonight, Lois advises Clark to don a disguise to protect his identity.

8PM | ABC
Supernanny – Jo‘s help is desperately needed, as a military wife whose husband is deployed in Afghanistan is trying to raise four adopted children, all under the age of 7, on her own.

9PM | CBS
CSI: NY – The CSIs are torn when a violent serial rapist is found murdered. Do they really want to catch the vigilante who killed the creep?

9PM | TEENNICK
Degrassi – Bianca wants to be with Drew, but a popular couple they do not make.

9PM | FOX
Fringe – Peter and Olivia try to heal the rift between them, as the team visits the home of a woman mourning the death of her husband.

9PM | ID – SERIES PREMIERE
The Injustice Files – The series investigates cold cases from the Civil Rights era, beginning with the unsolved 1967 murder of Wharlest Jackson, a man who was killed by a bomb in his truck after he accepted a promotion at a local factory in Mississippi.

9PM | THE CW
Supernatural – Dean rushes to save Lisa from impending doom, while Sam digs into a cluster of murders that may have been the result of some cruel practical jokes the dead dudes were playing on a female co-worker.

10:30PM | IFC
Portlandia – The town is excited about a new music and film festival. Fans of the show, meanwhile, should be excited that IFC just ordered a second season of the Fred Armisen comedy.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Who Do You Think You Are? (8PM, NBC) helps Rosie O’Donnell dig into her late mother’s family history;
– It’s a “redneck carnival” affair on My Big Redneck Wedding (8:30PM, CMT), which includes a dunk tank filled with beer;
– Obi-Wan and Anakin try to spring a Jedi general from a Separatist prison on Star Wars: The Clone Wars (8:30PM, Cartoon Network);
– Primetime: What Would You Do? (9PM, ABC) finds out how many people will say yes when asked by teens to purchase alcohol for them in a liquor store;
– Karl doles out romantic advice and tales of his kidney stones on The Ricky Gervais Show (9PM, HBO);
– On Bar Karma (10PM, Current), a children’s author comes to the bar, where he finds out his latest book is going to inspire an act of terrorism;
– Gold Rush: Alaska (10PM, Discovery) wraps its first season;
– Kevin Smith is the interview guest on Real Time With Bill Maher (10PM, HBO).

And the late-night line-up:
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): David Spade, Andy Kindler and Lukas Nelson and Promise of the Real;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Mark Harmon and 30 Seconds to Mars;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Adam Sandler and Bobby Flay (REPEAT);
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Patrice O’Neal, Ann Curry and Raekwon featuring Ghostface Killah and Jim Jones;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Lily Tomlin and D.J. Qualls;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Patton Oswalt.

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• Filed in Blue Bloods, Late Night, TV Picks
• Tags: Blue Bloods, CSI: NY, Degrassi, Fringe, Kitchen Nightmares, Portlandia, Smallville, Supernanny, Supernatural, The Injustice Files, Tom Selleck, Wharlest Jackson

(ALL TIMES ET)

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Restaurant: Impossible – Sure, it’s already been done, and is still being done on Fox’s Friday nights, in fact, by Gordon Ramsay, but don’t write this Food Network version of Kitchen Nightmares off. Gordo’s antics have worn thin, especially since many of his makeovers seem to revolve more around his own ego than around helping out struggling restaurant owners. But Restaurant: Impossible host Chef Robert Irvine not only appears to be invested in helping his clients first and foremost, but he performs some pretty impressive menu, decor and attitude makeovers on a tight $10,000 budget for each episode. Tonight, Robert heads off to Rascal’s BBQ & Crab House in New Castle, Delaware, where he’s dismayed to find a filthy kitchen, mounds of garbage and very few customers. Let’s just say the Rascal’s folks will test his budget and his patience.

8PM | FOX
American Idol – First round auditions continue in Austin. Steven Tyler‘s first round creepiness in flirting with 16-year-olds also continues in Austin.

9PM | HISTORY CHANNEL
Bigfoot: The Definitive Guide – Seeking to prove – or disprove – once and for all the existence of Bigfoot, a.k.a. Sasquatch.

9PM | FOX
Human Target – Tony “Buster Bluth” Hale is back as bumbling P.I. Harry. Here’s hoping that Arrested Development movie happens soon, because we don’t get to see enough of that guy.

9PM | TLC
My Strange Addiction – Tonight’s subjects: A woman addicted to cleaning her house and another woman who’s obsessed with collecting rocks. Nope, both of those things still seem perfectly normal compared to last week’s sex doll guy.

10PM | CBS
Blue Bloods – An undercover counterterrorism agent is shot and Frank (Tom Selleck) assigns the investigation to the only man he knows he can trust: His son Danny (Donnie Wahlberg). But because the agent was trying to infiltrate a sleeper cell and Frank doesn’t want to blow his cover, Danny can’t tell anyone what he’s investigating.

10PM | SYFY
Face Off – For tonight’s challenge on this fun special effects makeup competition series, the contestants have to do full body makeup presentations. And yes, the Face Off host is Sheridan Crane.

10PM | MTV
I Used to Be Fat – So much good TV, way too much of it on at 10PM. Like this inspiring weight loss series, which focuses on teens like Daria, a lonely girl whose attempts to shed extra pounds would get a big boost if only she had her mother’s support.

10PM | BRAVO
Top Chef: All-Stars – Creating a three-course Italian meal is the challenge, and the contestants have some tough guest judges to impress in Isaac Mizrahi and The Sopranos‘ Lorraine Bracco.

10:30PM | A&E
Storage Wars – What makes this show so compelling? The big personalities, sure, but I think we’re also truly fascinated by stuff … the stuff people will pay good money to store, and the stuff that people will abandon, even though they once paid good money to store it. In tonight’s episode, those aforementioned big personalities head to Las Vegas to scope out new old stuff.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– A fascinating installment on how the brain really works includes Penn and Teller explaining how the brain processes visual info, while Mo Rocca shares what he learns about mind control on Nova scienceNow (8PM, PBS);
– On Man v. Food: The Carnivore Chronicles (9PM, Travel Channel), Adam visits Katz Deli in New York City, a.k.a. the place where Meg Ryan really enjoyed her sandwich in When Harry Met Sally;
– A billionaire (guest star Colm Feore) uses his cash, and his well-paid attorney, to derail a charge against him of sexually abusing a teenage girl on Law & Order: SVU (10PM, NBC);
– Erica tries to get over her breakup with Ethan, while Dr. Tom wants to talk about Claire on Being Erica (11PM, SOAPnet);
– Friends alum, and star of the upcoming ABC comedy Mr. Sunshine, Matthew Perry, visits The Daily Show (11PM, Comedy Central);
– And the always hilarious Jim Gaffigan visits The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS).

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• Filed in TV Picks
• Tags: American Idol, Bigfoot: The Definitive Guide, Blue Bloods, Face Off, Human Target, I Used to Be Fat, My Strange Addiction, Restaurant: Impossible, Storage Wars, Tom Selleck, Top Chef: All-Stars

Hey TVScreeners. As you might have noticed, things have been pretty quiet on the TVScreener.com front lately. Blame a slew of holiday gift guides and other features I’ve been writing for TV Squad, plus a little 50,000-word book project that I have, oh, about a month to write … but that’ll wrap shortly (and I’ll share more about it when the release date gets closer), and things will be back to normal around the ol’ TV blog soon enough. PS – Stay tuned for a killer TVScreener.com Christmas giveaway. Seriously, hundreds of dollars worth of TV-related swag to share, and it kicks off right after Thanksgiving!

In the meantime, I had to take a sec to post about the awesome little ’80s revival that’s happening in primetime these days:

– Magnum P.I. star Tom Selleck‘s back on the tube with Blue Bloods, one of the few new hits of the fall TV season;

– The Hollywood Reporter uh, reports, that Remington Steele and James Bond movie star Pierce Brosnan is headed back to primetime, in a show that sounds Bond-ish;

– The Hub is airing back-to-back episodes of Family Ties Monday thru Thursday nights (8 and 8:30 PM), which has not only been a reminder of what a genius of comedic timing Michael J. Fox is, but, via that “Sit, Ubu, sit” ending, has helped me finally figure out the origin of my obsession with Labrador Retrievers. PS – My fellow Family Ties fans, a must-read book: The autobio of Ties creator Gary David Goldberg, called Sit, Ubu, Sit and featuring the iconic photo of the pooch on the cover;

– The ubiquitous presence of Betty White (and all the ’80s stars on her TV Land sitcom Hot in Cleveland) on TV, as well as in the awesome new Golden Girls: 25th Anniversary Complete Collection DVD box set (in packaging that mimics Sophia’s handbag);

– TNT’s in-the-works Dallas series remake, which may star Patrick Duffy, Linda Gray and the legend himself, Larry Hagman as J.R. Ewing;

– Comedies like The Middle, Modern Family and Raising Hope (which several of my TV critic cohorts and I at Scooter McGavin’s 9th Green picked as one of the best new shows of the season) have led a revival of the type of great family sitcoms we haven’t seen a prevalence of since the ’80s;

– And the new TBS ’80s college comedy Glory Daze, which, in addition to being solidly funny and starring a cast of talented, endearing newcomers, also boasts the fashions, trends and music of the ’80s. Delightful.

Oh, and though it’s not primetime, it is ’80s TV-related: The Pee-wee Herman Show, the new Broadway show that’s like being live at Pee-wee’s Playhouse. TVScreener.com reader Rich told me he’s seeing the show the day after Thanksgiving, and I cannot highly enough recommend that anyone else who loves the Playhouse and will be in NYC during the holidays check it out. Even though the show isn’t about the holidays, I can’t think of a better way to get yourself in a feel-good holiday mood.

So, who else is loving this retro vibe in primetime? Dallas will soon return … what other ’80s drama or sitcom would you love to see remade? Which other ’80s TV superstars would you like to have join Tom Selleck, Pierce Brosnan and Ed O’Neill (not to mention Cheers star  Shelley Long as a Modern Family guest star and Miami Vice star Don Johnson in that recent Eastbound and Down appearance) in a return to TV land?

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• Filed in Betty White, Blue Bloods, Classic TV, I Love TV!, TV News, TV on DVD, TV Remake
• Tags: 80s TV, Betty White, Dallas remake TNT, Family Ties, Pee-wee Herman Show, Pierce Brosnan, Tom Selleck

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– There could never be too many interviews with Betty White, and here’s one from the New York Times, in which the Emmy-winning legend discusses, among other things, her upcoming guest stint as an anthropology professor on Community.

– Rosie O’Donnell‘s coming back to talk show land, thanks (???) to Oprah and her new OWN network.

– TLC is developing a reality series that’s being called a real-life version of Big Love.

– Almost as disturbing: A reality show in which the long-feuding Ryan and Tatum O’Neal allegedly make up. When his long-time girlfriend Farrah Fawcett died, Ryan O’Neal told a story about how he almost hit on his daughter at the funeral, because he didn’t recognize her. So … these two may be more than a scosche away from an even remotely normal father-daughter relationship.

– Glee: A Michael Jackson episode? Well, if Britney’s getting one …

– All is not well on the production of CBS’ new Tom Selleck series Blue Bloods. Deadline.com reports that the series’ showrunner has quit because of “creative differences” with Selleck over the direction of the NYPD cop drama.

– And several other new shows are having pre-season problems, to the point of having to reshoot their pilots. Among them: $#*! My Dad Says, the William Shatner sitcom that’s a (terribly titled) adaptation of the Twitter feed. I’ve seen the original pilot, and it is pretty bad. Maybe one minor chuckle in the whole thing, and that only came from a joke about Shatner’s infamous speaking pattern.

– When you think of home improvement, the first name you think of is … Vanilla Ice? No, but the one-hit-wonder rapper is going to be hosting his own DIY home show, The Vanilla Ice Project, on the DIY Network, beginning Oct. 14.

– The guy who was atop the American Idol judges wish list, but who producers couldn’t nab for the show: David Geffen.

– Speaking of the Idol-ers, how painful does this sound: a cruise with former AI stars?

– The Reality Rocks reality TV show convention, however, sounds fun.

– Bret Michaels‘ comment on being named co-host of the Miss Universe pageant on NBC on Aug. 23: “What could possibly go wrong? A rock star in a room full of beautiful women is bound to be entertaining.” It should prove to be entertaining, but given the year he’s had so far, probably best not to ask what could go wrong.

– Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane is also musically gifted, it turns out: He’s recording an album of show tune standards. The voice of Peter, Stewie and Brian Griffin is also hosting the Comedy Central Roast of David Hasselhoff on Aug. 15.

– Justin Timberlake will guest star on The Cleveland Show this season, voicing a gay character who’s the love interest of Jason Sudekis‘ Terry.

– You wouldn’t think a movie about a soap box derby could lead to a brawl, but that’s just what happened to Psych star Corbin Bernsen when he was filming a movie about the All-American Soap Box Derby in Ohio.

– Mary Hart‘s leaving Entertainment Tonight after her 30th season, because her pay was cut in half. Before you feel too sorry for her, consider what her salary was: $5 million a year.

• 1 Comment
• Filed in American Idol, Betty White, Blue Bloods, TV News
• Tags: Betty White, Blue Bloods, Tom Selleck, Vanilla Ice DIY show

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– Drama series haven’t fared well for him, but maybe Christian Slater will have better luck with his big-screen-to-TV ambitions as the star of Fox’s untitled fall comedy pilot about a team of security-cracking twentysomethings.

– Fox invited Conan O’Brien to take part in the Idol Gives Back charity special that airs April 21 on Fox, but NBC refused to give O’Brien a pass to make the non-NBC appearance. Lame. Still, the invitation suggests Fox is trying to build a relationship with the star of its potential new late-night franchise.

– BTW, for a shot at winning tix to one of O’Brien’s sold out comedy tour shows, hit Twitter.

– Great idea: Comedian and Parks and Recreation co-star Aziz Ansari will host the MTV Movie Awards on June 6.

– No need to wait for the next Curb Your Enthusiasm DVD release to get bonus features: Larry David is producing a series of featurettes that will include guest stars and pundits dissecting the moral implications of each episode of Curb when the show begins airing on the TV Guide Network this summer (June 2, to be exact).

– EW.com has details on a casting notice that makes it seem like this will be the final season of 24.

– Yay: Days of Our Lives has been renewed through the 2010-11 season. But the bad news: rumor has it that long-time DOOL star, and half of the Bo and Hope supercouple, Peter Reckell, has been let go from the soap.

– Starz, led by former HBO honcho Chris Albrecht, is forging ahead with plans to become a real destination for original programming with the development of a new drama that will put a modern spin on the story of Camelot (the Arthurian legend, not the JFK one).

– If your NCAA hoops bracket isn’t going so well, check out The Late Show‘s Stupid Pet Tricks bracket/competition (and enter for a chance to win a trip to New York City and see David Letterman‘s show live).

– Rosie O’Donnell is planning to launch a new daytime TV talk show in 2011, just as Oprah‘s daily show ends. Rosie’s gotten wackier and wackier since her days on The View, and her old daily talk show, so it’ll be interesting to see if she can still draw a big audience to TV every day.

– Glee, on Broadway? Makes perfect sense to me.

– Betty White is coming back to primetime full-time, and, more good news, about another classic TV star: Tom Selleck is in final negotiations to lead CBS’ fall cop drama pilot, in which he would star as the chief of the NYPD, and Donnie Wahlberg would play his son, an NYPD detective. Awesome.

– And My Name Is Earl dad Beau Bridges will be Jim Rockford’s (Dermot Mulroney) dad on CBS’ Rockford Files remake.

– Among the stars of Bravo’s upcoming The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills spin-off: Kelsey Grammer‘s wife Camille and two of Paris Hilton‘s aunts, including Escape to Witch Mountain star (and guest star of a memorable Little House on the Prairie episode) Kim Richards.

– The last time Oprah went on trial, the end result was that Dr. Phil was unleashed on the world. Let’s hope things turn out better this time.

– Among the new shows SyFy announced at the network’s upfront presentation last week: a cooking show, a magic show and a reality series about special effects make-up artists.

– What every Jersey Shore fan needs on his or her desk: A talking bobblehead version of Snooki, The Situation or DJ Pauly D.

– Paula Abdul has officially turned down the offer to host an ABC revamp of Star Search, making it seem even more likely that she’s holding out for a spot on Simon Cowell‘s U.S. version of X Factory.

– And, at last, someone else who feels the way I do about The Middle. I like Modern Family a lot, but I love The Middle.

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• Filed in 24, Daytime TV, Real Housewives, TV News, TV Toys
• Tags: Aziz Ansari MTV Movie Awards, Christian Slater Fox comedy, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Days of Our Lives renewed, Jersey Shore bobblehead, Peter Reckell, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Tom Selleck