In tonight’s new episode of Better Off Ted (8:30PM ET, ABC), thanks to a typo in a corporate  memo, Veridian Dynamics employees think they are being encouraged to make inappropriate, offensive comments to each other.

Here’s the naughty outtakes video from that episode, and, I can’t stress strongly enough, though it is hilarious, you really, really shouldn’t watch it at work. Really.

By the way, the show has only gotten better in its second season, but with ABC’s freshman comedies making such a splash in primetime, Ted has kinda gotten kicked to the curb. That’s a shame, and tonight’s episode is a great time to start checking out the funny …

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• Tags: Better Off Ted, Better Off Ted NSFW, Better Off Ted outtakes

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– Ed McMahon, TV land’s greatest sidekick as Johnny Carson‘s announcer on The Tonight Show, has died at age 86. The Hollywood veteran had reportedly been battling bone cancer, among other illnesses.

– Yes, it’s true, we sadly haven’t seen the last of Jessica Simpson on reality TV. Simpson will star in The Price of Beauty for VH-1, where she’ll travel around the world and “study the local fashions, dietary fads and beauty regimes and even participate in some of the extreme practices she discovers.”

– Jon and Kate Gosselin confirmed that they’re separating on last night’s Jon & Kate Plus 8 (as if People.com’s confirmation that they’d filed divorce papers earlier in the day didn’t make their announcement moot), and now the speculation is already starting about a possible custody battle.

– Producer/writer Bryan Fuller has left Heroes again, which means there’s little chance of the tired show returning to its first-season glory.

– The View co-host, and Celiac disease book author, Elisabeth Hasselbeck is being sued by another Celiac disease book author, who claims E.H. stole her idea.

– Bravo is launching a new series in which host Andy Cohen will talk about … other Bravo series.

– And tonight in primetime:

– The fourth season premiere of America’s Got Talent (9PM ET, NBC), with newbie host Nick Cannon
– The series premiere of NYC Prep (10PM, Bravo)
– The Real Housewives of New Jersey Watch What Happens Reunion (9PM, Bravo)
– The second season premiere of The Cleaner (10PM, A&E)
– The premiere of the Battle of the Network Stars-ish The Superstars (8PM, ABC)
– Cloris Leachman and Theo Huxtable, a.k.a. Malcolm-Jamal Warner guest star on HawthoRNe (9PM, TNT)
– The finale of Life After People on History Channel (10PM)
– Rescue Me‘s creative resurgence continues on FX (10PM)
– And Ted learns about Phil and Lem’s fight club – make that a medieval fight club, in the Veridian basement – in a hilarious new episode of Better Off Ted (9:30PM, ABC)

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• Tags: America's Got Talent, Andy Cohen, Better Off Ted, Bravo, Bryan Fuller, Cloris Leachman, Ed McMahon, Elisabeth Hasselbeck, Hawthorne, Heroes, Jessica Simpson, Jon and Kate Gosselin divorce, Malcolm-Jamal Warner, Nick Cannon, NYC Prep, Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion, Rescue Me, The Cleaner, The Price of Beauty

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– The Eminem/Bruno (Sacha Baron Cohen) brouhaha from the MTV Movie Awards got all the press, but how deliciously campy was it when Kristin Cavallari showed up at Spencer and Heidi‘s wedding wearing the exact same color dress as her old Laguna Beach enemy Lauren Conrad on last night’s ep of The Hills?

– More Hills news: The stars of the show are upset that Paris Hilton called their show fake. Insert your own joke here about the pot calling the kettle fake.

– BTW, the winners at last night’s Andy Samberg-hosted MTV Movie Awards included Heath Ledger for Best Villain and waaaaaay too many popcorn statues for the Twilight cast.

– Wanna guarantee yourself a reality TV deal? Apparently fertility drugs, and a heaping side dish of crazy, are the answer. As creepy as she is, Octomom Nadya Suleman has signed a deal to film a series starring her brood, though no American network has agreed to air it. Yet. Meanwhile, did you know that she actually likes the Octomom nickname, so much so that she’s trying to trademark it?

– Bob Saget‘s Surviving Suburbia couldn’t survive the summer TV line-up. Better Off Ted, meanwhile, will get some summer lovin’ from ABC, as the quirky comedy rejoins the line-up on June 23.

– Susan Boyle losing Britain’s Got Talent … as shocking as Adam Lambert losing American Idol?

– Ray Romano talks about his upcoming dramedy, how he thinks Jay Leno‘s new show will do and about what he watches on TV. Hint: Lots of reality stuff and 24.

– And speaking of 24, Freddie Prinze Jr. as a wannabe Jack Bauer and now Forrest Gump‘s Mykelti Williamson as the new Bill Buchanan on the next season of 24 … it’s almost sounding like a whole new show, isn’t it?

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• Tags: 24, Adam Lambert, American Idol, Andy Samberg, Better Off Ted, Bob Saget, Britain's Got Talent, Bruno, Eminem, Freddie Prinze Jr., Jack Bauer, Jay Leno, Kristin Cavallari, Laguna Beach, Lauren Conrad, MTV, MTV Movie Awards, Mykelti Williamson, Nadya Suleman, Octomom, Paris Hilton, Ray Romano, Sacha Baron Cohen, Spencer and Heidi, Spencer and Heidi wedding, Spencer Pratt, Surviving Suburbia, Susan Boyle, The Hills

A rundown of what is/isn’t/might be popping up on the 2009-10 primetime schedule at ABC during this week’s Upfront presentation …

ABC (Upfront presentation: Tuesday, May 19)
Returning series: America’s Funniest Home Videos, The Bachelor, Better Off Ted, Brothers & Sisters, Castle, Dancing with the Stars, Desperate Housewives, Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, Grey’s Anatomy, Lost, Private Practice, Scrubs, Supernanny, True Beauty, Ugly Betty, Wife Swap
On the bubble series: Surviving Suburbia
New series:

– Cougar Town (Comedy)
Plot: The dating adventures of a newly-single mom and her teen son
It stars: Courteney Cox, Busy Philipps, Brian Van Holt, Christa Miller, Josh Hopkins and Ian Gomez, created by Scrubs creator Bill Lawrence
It’s like: Janice Dickinson‘s life

– The Deep End (Dramedy)
Plot: Newbie attorneys at a prestigious law firm
It stars: Billy Zane and Tina Majorino
It’s like: Scrubs or Grey’s Anatomy in a law firm

– Eastwick (Drama)
Plot: Three witches come into their powers when a mysterious fellow arrives in town
It stars: Rebecca Romijn, Lindsay Price, Matt Dallas and Sara Rue
It’s like: The John Updike novel and big-screen movie The Witches of Eastwick, on which it’s based

– Flash Forward (Drama)
Plot: Sci-fi-ish story about what happens when the world blacks out for two minutes and everyone has visions of the future
It stars: Joseph Fiennes, Sonya Walger, John Cho and Courtney Vance
It’s like: Every show that has employed the unfortunately ubiquitous time travel gimmick on TV recently (i.e. the network hopes it’ll catch on just as Lost unrolls its final season)

…Read more

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• Tags: ABC, Alyssa Milano, Better Off Ted, Billy Zane, Castle, Cedric the Entertainer, Cougar Town, Courteney Cox, Eastwick, Ed O'Neill, Elizabeth Mitchell, Empire State, Fall TV season, Flash Forward, Geoff Stults, Hank, Happy Town, Inside the Box, Kelsey Grammer, Kim Raver, Lost, Matt Dallas, Modern Family, Morris Chestnut, Patricia Heaton, Rebecca Romijn, Reiko Aylesworth, Romantically Challenged, Scott Wolf, Scrubs, Shonda Rhimes, The Deep End, The Forgotten, The Law, The Middle, Twin Peaks, Upfront, V