All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– The next season of 24 may be its last. Sad news – it’s my all-time favorite TV drama – but it’s gotta be one of the most exhausting shows to make, for the cast, crew and writers. Besides, the end of the series will likely mean a big-screen movie (or movies), so we’ve got that going for us, which is nice.

– Variety has an early review for next week’s third season premiere of Mad Men, and it’s a very positive one.

– And New York City is also going mad for Mad Men next week.

– Oprah is allegedly being sued for a trillion dollars. At least she can probably afford it.

– This story alleges that the reason Jon Gosselin is so in demand is because women want to save him and they feel he’s misunderstood. Or perhaps it’s just that these women are just that desperate for their own little piece of reality infamy, even if they have to go through an Ed Hardy-obsessed d-bag to get it. But that’s just my theory.

– And this story, which goes into detail about The Real Housewives of New York City star Bethanny Frankel‘s pregnancy testing experiences, is really, really too much information.

– Jay Leno has booked quite the musical line-up for his primetime premiere on Sept. 14: Jay-Z, Rihanna and Kanye West.

– Speaking of Leno, some of TV’s top showrunners are speaking out about what a bad move the Leno-in-primetime show is for scripted fare.

– Oh, Billy Mays … the autopsy report on the pitchman’s death says cocaine contributed to his death earlier this summer.

– The final season of Nip/Tuck premieres on FX on Oct. 14.

– Paula Abdul says she’s gotten lots of job offers since quitting American Idol, but I bet none of them are going to pay her millions of dollars.

– Speaking of Paula, being her fan can get you beaten up. Ask Constantine Maroulis.

– And this weekend in primetime:

FRIDAY
– NBC’s fantastic cop drama Southland is re-airing throughout the summer (8PM ET)
– Shark attack survivor Bethany Hamilton is a contestants on Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader (8PM, Fox)
– Denzel Washington, James Caan and Quentin Tarantino are the guests on Friday Night with Jonathan Ross (8PM, BBCA)
– Surviving Suburbia season finale on ABC (8PM)
– 24‘s heroic Aaron Pierce, a.k.a. actor Glenn Morshower, guests on Mental at 9PM on Fox
– Elizabeth Perkins guest stars on the eighth (and final) season premiere of Monk on USA (9PM)
– Lock ‘n Load with R. Lee Ermey (9PM) examines the history of the military tank
– Eureka‘s teens are acting mighty strange (9PM, SyFy)
– Cesar helps a ‘fraidy cat, er dog, named Roscoe on Dog Whisperer (9PM, NGC)
– Discovery Channel re-airs its scary, fact-based Shark Week movie Blood in the Water, the story that inspired Jaws (9PM)
– A Red Cross employee gets new duds on What Not to Wear (9PM, TLC)
– The Goode Family wraps its first season on ABC (9:30PM)
– Psych returns for its fourth season (yay!) with Cary Elwes guest-starring as an international art thief who eludes Lassiter, Shawn and Gus (10PM, USA)
– The Soup is cookin’ up some pop culture funny at 10PM (E!)
– IFC has part two of three of the Chris Kattan miniseries Bollywood Hero (10PM)
– It’s chefs vs. foodies in a big-city battle on the series premiere of Food Network’s Chefs vs. City (10PM)
– The team tries can keep a cool Gibson Les Paul guitar if they can prevent it from burning up in a fire on Catch It Keep It (10PM, Science)

SATURDAY
– Three full hours of Unwrapped eps on the Food Network (8PM)
– Dogs are behaving badly on back-to-back eps of In the Dog House on Animal Planet (8PM)
– A truck driver tries to win $1 million on NBC’s new poker series Face the Ace (9PM)
– Bill gives money to his scheming bro on The Bill Engvall Show (9PM, TBS)
– SyFy’s guilty pleasure movie of the week: Infestation (9PM)
– BBCA has a new ep (9PM) of its new drama Being Human
– It’s the series finale of Dirty Sexy Money (10PM, ABC)
– Bollywood Hero concludes on IFC (10PM)
– George Lopez does his stand-up act in George Lopez: Tall, Dark and Chicano (10PM, HBO)

SUNDAY
– Who Wants to Be a Millionaire celebrates its 10th anniversary with a limited-run return, with original host Regis Philbin (8PM, ABC)
– Nominations for the next eviction are revealed on Big Brother 11 (8PM, CBS)
– The Bills and the Titans play an exhibition game at the Pro football Hall of Fame in Canton on NBC (8PM)
– Ruby‘s (8PM, Style) tries to recall her forgotten childhood
– Eight neighboring families are walled off into a community where they compete for a $250,000 prize on the series premiere of There Goes the Neighborhood (9PM, CBS)
– Office Space star Ron Livingston is an astronaut who embarks on a long mission to Venus in the new ABC drama series Defying Gravity (9PM)
– Deb wigs about Jane’s birthday on Drop Dead Diva (9PM, Lifetime)
– Eric’s arrival changes things for Sookie on True Blood (9PM, HBO)
– It’s the eighth season finale of Law & Order: Criminal Intent (9PM, USA)
– Admitted gold digger Megan Hauserman tries to land a rich dude on her Rock of Love spin-off Megan Wants a Millionaire (9PM, VH1)
– A bride asks her hubby-to-be to sell blood to pay for her hair appointment on Bridezillas (9PM, WE)
– Tornados (9PM) and lighting (10PM) are the subjects of Raging Planet episodes on Discovery Channel
– On Ice Road Truckers (9PM, History), there are just two weeks left in the season
– The fourth season of America’s Best Dance Crew premieres on MTV (9PM)
– ABC has the series premiere of Shark Tank (9PM), where people pitch their inventions to potential investors
– On a new In Plain Sight on USA (10PM), a political activist hates her new home
– Back-to-back new episodes of Pawn Stars on History Channel (10 and 10:30PM)
– On Hung (10PM, HBO), Jessica forces Ronnie to tell her the truth about their new financial situation
– A couple asks for a peacock cake on Amazing Wedding Cakes (10PM, WE)
– Country singer Shelby Lynne guests on Army Wives (10PM, Lifetime)
– Jesse tries to escape from a burning vehicle on Jesse James Is a Dead Man (10PM, Spike)
– Vince and Drama golf with (guest stars) Tom Brady and (series producer) Mark Wahlberg on Entourage (10:30PM, HBO)

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• Filed in 24, TV News
• Tags: 24 series ending, Bethanny Frankel, Billy Mays, Mad Men, Mad Men season 3 review, Nip/Tuck finale season, Oprah sued, The Real Housewives of New York City

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– The numbers are in, and more than 31 million viewers tuned in for the Michael Jackson memorial telecast on Tuesday.

– The United States Olympic Committee is launching a cable channel that will be devoted to coverage of the Olympics and Paralympics.

– The sixth season of Top Chef will take place in Sin City. Top Chef: Las Vegas premieres on Bravo on August 26.

– Lifetime has revealed the contestants for its first season of Project Runway, which will include cameos by Lindsay Lohan and Christina Aguilera.

– OZ star Terry Kinney has joined the cast of The Mentalist, where he’ll play a cop.

– Robin Williams will film his upcoming stand-up performance in Washington, D.C. for an HBO special that will air in December. It’s his first HBO solo show since 2002.

– Socialite Life has pics of Prison Break star Wentworth Miller guest starring on Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, but the interesting photos are the ones of a very muscular SVU star Christopher Meloni … those are some Incredible Hulk-ish biceps. Who knew? Meanwhile, Will & Grace star Eric McCormack has signed on to play a sugar daddy in the new season’s second episode.

– Billy Mays will live on as a TV pitchman, including new spots for the Jupiter Jack, a gadget that lets you use your cell phone hands-free in a car.

– Another Real World alum is running for Congress: Real World: New York‘s Kevin Powell ran in New York last year, and now Sean Duffy, the Real World: Boston cast member who married and has five children with Real World: San Francisco‘s Rachel Campos, has announced his candidacy in Wisconsin.

– And tonight in primetime:

– Big Brother 11 premieres on CBS (8PM ET)
– ABC has back-to-back episodes of Samantha Who? (8PM)
– More dramarama with The Real Housewives of New Jersey Lost Footage special on Bravo (9PM)
– Michael’s charged with saving the lives of his fellow spies on a new Burn Notice (9PM, USA)
– Discovery Channel premieres Pitchman: A Tribute to Billy Mays at 9PM
– Hank plays doc to a family with a private island on Royal Pains (10PM, USA)
– The contestants have to make red carpet gowns on The Fashion Show (10PM, Bravo)
– On 16 & Pregnant (10PM, MTV), a teen and her mother are both preggers and getting on each other’s nerves in their small home
– The new season of L.A. Ink premieres on TLC at 10PM
– The women have to take part in a fitness shoot on She’s Got the Look (9PM, TV Land)
– The Science of the Movies (10PM, Science Channel) goes behind the scenes with the Muppets
– And Russ’ flirting lands him in some hot water on Southern Belles: Louisville (10PM, SoapNet)

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• Filed in Reality, TV News
• Tags: Billy Mays, Christopher Meloni, Michael Jackson memorial, Olympics cable network, Project Runway Lifetime, Real World Congress, Sean Duffy, Sean Duffy Congress, Top Chef: Las Vegas, Wentworth Miller

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– Neil Patrick Harris hosting the Emmys … that should definitely happen.

– Let no angle in the Michael Jackson story go uncovered: Anderson Cooper got the scoop on Bubbles the chimp last night on CNN.

– Speaking of celeb deaths, the sad trend continues for TV stars. Streets of San Francisco star (and Oscar winner) Karl Malden got all the press yesterday, but Broadway, big screen and tube star Harve Presnell – he was Dawson’s cantankerous friend/mentor Mr. Brooks on Dawson’s Creek – died on Tuesday at age 75.

– Bravo’s premiering a second season of The Rachel Zoe Project on Aug. 25.

– Christian Slater‘s My Own Worst Enemy flopped, but the Heathers star may be headed back to the tube in ABC’s fall drama The Forgotten. Slater would play a cop-turned-private detective whose daughter was kidnapped.

– Coyote Ugly star Piper Perabo (a fellow Ohio University alum – Go Bobcats!) has signed on to star in the USA drama pilot Covert Affairs, which sounds an awful lot like Alias. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

– Prison Break star Wentworth Miller will be on the other side of the law – playing an NYPD officer – on the season premiere of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (Sept. 23, NBC).

– Lost star Michael Emerson predicts a sad ending for the show, with (more) major character deaths and what he describes as a “series finale for grown-ups.”

– Kiefer Sutherland confirms that 24 will shoot some season eight scenes at the real United Nations. Jack Bauer’s next really long day will unfold in New York City (Jan. 17, 2010).

– This certainly trumps the Flintstone vitamin in TV-related pharmacology: Homer Simpson ecstasy.

– Billy Mays‘ infomercials will continue to air, and Discovery Channel has planned a tribute to the late pitchmen for July 9. Meanwhile, the New York Times has a rundown of five memorable moments from last night’s Pitchmen season (series?) finale.

– There’s official So You Think You Can Dance confirmation that Katie Holmes will be tapping her toes – for a new dance education charity she co-founded – on the show’s 100th episode, July 23.

– And tonight in primetime:

– William Shatner stops by G4’s Attack of the Show (7PM ET) to chat about his new Tek War comic
– A military couple who has spent a lot of time apart is shipped home and given a dream wedding on TNT’s Wedding Day (8PM)
– ABC has back-to-back new eps of the sadly canceled Samantha Who? (8PM)
– Kelly Clarkson sings “I Do Not Hook Up” as the top 14 becomes the top 12 on So You Think You Can Dance (Fox, 9PM)
– A teen who wants to join the Air Force may have her dreams dashed when she becomes preggers on the latest ep of 16 & Pregnant on MTV (10PM)
– Shea becomes a full-on bridezilla on Southern Belles: Louisville on SoapNet (10PM)
– TV Land has a new installment of She’s Got the Look (10PM)
– Science Channel’s Science of the Movies examines 3-D animation (10PM)

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• Filed in Award shows, Lost, Reality, TV News
• Tags: 24 season 8, 24 United Nations, Anderson Cooper, Billy Mays, Billy Mays Pitchmen, Billy Mays tribute, Bubbles the chimp, Christian Slater The Forgotten, Emmys, Harve Presnell, Homer Simpson ecstasy, Kiefer Sutherland, Michael Emerson Lost, Michael Jackson, Neil Patrick Harris, Piper Perabo Covert Affairs, So You Think You Can Dance Katie Holmes, The Rachel Zoe Project, Wentworth Miller, William Shatner

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– Office Space star Ron Livingston is set to boldly go into another kind of space with ABC’s new sci-fi series Defying Gravity. The show, scheduled to premiere this summer, revolves around a group of international astronauts who are sent on a “mysterious” six-year mission through the solar system.

– AOL’s PopEater wonders if farmer Kevin Skinner might be America’s Got Talent‘s version of Susan Boyle. Judge for yourself via the video of Skinner’s performance.

– MTV has given a season-two greenlight to 16 & Pregnant, the fantastic documentary series that follows teen moms-to-be as they deal with pregnancy and the realities of raising babies when they’re still kids themselves. The network has also announced a first season finale special, 16 & Pregnant: Life After Labor, that will be hosted by Dr. Drew Pinsky on July 23. In it, all six teen moms from the inaugural episodes will chat about their experiences and answer questions from a live audience.

– After his stint on Celebracadara (and a memorable guest gig on Southland), C. Thomas Howell will return to reality TV as the host of CMT’s All Jacked Up on Aug. 22. The show, in which the Soul Man star travel around the country “in search of outlandish, funny and extreme stunts, sports, events, people and inventions,” sorta sounds like Jackass-meets-America’s Got Talent-ish.

– Sci Fi (soon to be SyFy) is developing a remake of the short-lived Fox drama Alien Nation.

– The new Lifetime dramedy Drop Dead Diva (which premieres on July 12) will feature guest appearances by Liza Minnelli and Delta Burke, who will play feuding sisters. Rosie O’Donnell will also play a judge in the episode, which is set to air on Sept. 20.

– The big ratings winners of the week among premieres: HBO’s Hung, which was HBO’s biggest premiere in two years with 2.8 million viewers, and Oxygen’s Dance Your Ass Off, which, with 1.3 million viewers, was the highest-rated premiere in Oxygen’s history. PS – Check out the TVScreener.com reviews of Hung and Dance Your Ass Off.

– And NBC News’s upcoming series The Wanted (July 20) sounds like a real-life version of The A-Team, as “an elite team with backgrounds in intelligence, unconventional warfare and investigative journalism” tries to hunt down terrorists and war criminals.

– And tonight in primetime:

– Discovery Channel’s season marathon of Pitchmen episodes, featuring the late Billy Mays, continues all day, leading into the first season finale at 10PM ET
– Animal Planet premieres Monster Inside Me, all about parasites that prey on humans, at 9PM ET
– Wipeout. ABC, 8PM. More big red balls
– The Reno 911! deputies think aliens have come to town (10:30PM, Comedy Central)
– Teddy has company woes of his and tries to help a young girl who needs a kidney transplant on The Philanthropist (10PM, NBC)
– The Fashion Show crew gets busy designing sleepy-time wear (10PM, Bravo)
– One pair feuds while another hooks up on The Real World: Cancun (10PM, MTV)
– There are back-to-back new eps of Tattoo Highway on A&E (10 and 10:30PM)
– And E! has home videos of young Michael Jackson and his family on Michael Jackson: An E! Entertainment Special (10PM)

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• Filed in Reality, TV News
• Tags: 16 & Pregnant, 16 & Pregnant: Life After Labor, Alien Nation, America's Got Talent, Billy Mays, C. Thomas Howell, Dance Your Ass Off, Delta Burke, Dr. Drew Pinsky, Drop Dead Diva, Hung, Kevin Skinner, Liza Minnelli, Michael Jackson, Pitchmen, Ron Livingston, The A-Team, The Philanthropist, The Real World: Cancun, The Wanted NBC News

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– The New York Post claims Simon Cowell has been offered around $144 million per season – more than triple his current salary – to return as an American Idol judge. Is he worth it? Is anyone worth that much money for any job? Still, I don’t think I could sit through the show every week if it were Simon-less.

– Discovery Channel will go ahead with its plans for a Pitchmen marathon on July 1 (beginning at 11AM ET), leading up to the show’s season finale at 10PM. The show, of course, stars the late Billy Mays and shines the light on how his $1 billion business, with partner and fellow pitchman Anthony Sullivan, works.

– Mays, by the way, apparently suffered a heart attack and died in his sleep.

– Law & Order: Special Victims Unit stars Mariska Hargitay and Chris Meloni, who had been in reportedly contentious salary negotiations, have both signed on to return to the NBC drama next season. Christine Lahti is also joining the show as an ADA for four episodes.

– Former Saturday Night Live star Chris Kattan has signed on to be a regular on the new ABC comedy The Middle, which stars Patricia Heaton and Scrubs‘ Neil Flynn.

– CBS will premiere its reality series There Goes the Neighborhood on Aug. 9. American Idol alum Matt Rogers will host the show, which finds eight families stuck behind a 20-foot wall in their ‘hood, without electronic communication or entertainment (No TV! No videogames! No Internet!). The fams have to work together and compete against the other fams to win the $250,000 grand prize.

– Among VH1’s upcoming series: Reality shows starring Chili from TLC, Pepa from Salt n’ Pepa and Frank “The Entertainer” Moresco, the I Love New York and I Love Money alum who currently lives with his parents. The Entertainer will find Moresco looking for love. Line up, ladies … it’s not every day you get the chance to hook up with a 32-year-old who lives in Mom and Dad’s basement. I hope it isn’t, anyway.

– It’s official: the sixth, and final, season of Lost will include 18 hours of island drama.

And tonight in primetime:
– Fox is showing Legally Blonde (8PM ET), one of my all-time fave chick flicks
– Stars Reflect on the Man in the Mirror (8PM, TV Guide Channel), features celebs talking about Michael Jackson‘s impact on music and pop culture
– Catch Farrah Fawcett‘s chilling, Emmy-nominated performance in the 1984 TV flick The Burning Bed on Encore Drama (9:35PM)
– There’s more bratty teen drama on Bravo’s “real-life Gossip Girl” docudrama NYC Prep (9PM)
– Sean gets a surprise visitor in the hospital on Rescue Me (10PM, FX)
– More early auditions on America’s Got Talent (9PM, NBC)
– Linda has to move into Ted’s office after some toxic substance runs amuck on Better Off Ted (9:30PM, ABC)
– The BET Awards repeat (6:30PM, BET) in case you missed all the Michael Jackson tributes
– William’s father/son bonding weekend is interrupted when a pair of alcoholics need William’s help on The Cleaner (10PM, A&E)
– One smokin’ dude gets a cigar lounge on a new ep of Man Caves (9PM, DIY)
– And Dr. Mike tests leech therapy in India on Bite Me with Dr. Mike (10PM, Travel Channel)

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• Filed in Celebreality, Lost, Reality, TV News
• Tags: American Idol, Billy Mays, Chris Kattan, Chris Meloni, Christine Lahti, Farrah Fawcett, Frank "The Entertainer" Moresco, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, Lost, Mariska Hargitay, Matt Rogers, Neil Flynn, Patricia Heaton, Pitchmen, Saturday Night Live, Simon Cowell, The Middle Chris Kattan, There Goes the Neighborhood