(ALL TIMES ET)

11PM | MTV – SERIES PREMIERE
Chelsea Settles – 23-year-old Pittsburgh native Chelsea moves to Los Angeles to pursue her dream of a career in the fashion industry. Her extra challenge: she’s plus-sized, meaning she’s trying to break into an industry that is not so accepting of anyone who doesn’t wear size 6 or smaller. But I dare you not to root for Chelsea to succeed. Double dare you, even!

8PM | ABC – SERIES PREMIERE
Last Man Standing – Tim Allen‘s back in this sitcom which is exactly like Home Improvement, if a) Tim Taylor had daughters instead of sons and b) wasn’t funny.

8PM | CBS
NCIS – Abby (Pauley Perrette) learns something surprising about her family when she volunteers to be a kidney donor.

9PM | WE
Downsized – Laura and Todd consider going to counseling to work out their financial disagreements, while Bailey worries about paying for her senior photos.

9PM | THE CW
The Ringer – Gemma asks for a favor that could ruin Bridget’s life, and Henry gets some bad news about his writing career.

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Chopped – Among the mystery basket goodies: edible flowers.

10PM | MTV – 2ND SEASON PREMIERE
I Used to Be Fat – The inspirational show where teens try to get healthy and change their lives before heading off to college returns with Josh, a 310-pound teen who wants to lose weight so he can play sports with his family.

10PM | NBC
Parenthood – Sarah and Mark fans, turbulence ahead: Seth (John Corbett) returns.

10PM | FX
Sons of Anarchy – Oh, Juice. That missing package of drugs is causing all kinds of problems for the club, as is the pressure Juice is under from new lawman Roosevelt. Meanwhile, Clay’s plan for Tara is making for some very scary potential storylines in Charming, i.e. the show has gotten soooo good in the last few weeks.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Mike Epps hosts the sixth annual Hip Hop Awards (8PM, BET);
– The players try to win letters from home on The Biggest Loser (8PM, NBC);
– Someone gets kicked to the curb on Dancing With the Stars (8PM, ABC);
– Hetty reveals some details to Callen about his past on NCIS: Los Angeles (9PM, CBS);
– On Unforgettable (10PM, CBS), when a crime scene is destroyed by a fire, Carrie’s memory of the scene provides the only clues for a murder investigation.

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Merle Haggard and Will Arnett;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Hugh Jackman (REPEAT);
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Mark Cuban (REPEAT);
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Matthew Broderick;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Julie Bowen;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Don Rickles;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Samuel L. Jackson;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Steven Wright;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Roy Choi.

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• Filed in Late Night, Sons of Anarchy, TV Picks
• Tags: Chelsea Settles, Chopped, Downsized, I Used to Be Fat MTV, NCIS, Parenthood, Sons of Anarchy, The Ringer

(ALL TIMES ET)

10PM | FX
Sons of Anarchy – Gemma makes friends with another wife, and Clay and the club members make a surprising, and unwelcome, discovery when they set off on a new business venture.

8PM | FOX
Glee – Brittany offers to help Kurt with his campaign for student body president, while Rachel’s mama (guest star Idina Menzel) returns and duets with Rachel.

8PM | CBS
NCIS – The team is shocked when a Marine shows up at his homecoming party with a fatal stab wound, but even more surprising is his hidden past.

9PM | BBC AMERICA
24 Hours in the ER – You’ll be thankful you’re healthy, or be inspired to get healthy, after a look at this moving documentary series, which follows the around the clock action at the King’s College Hospital ER in London.

9PM | WE
Downsized – In a scenario that’s all too familiar to too many families, the Bruces are finally in a better place financially, when yet another medical crisis strikes one of the kids. Meanwhile, Laura, facing a potential job loss because of budget cuts in her school district, comes up with a clever idea to keep her position safe.

9PM | FOX
New Girl – The fellas help Jess get her stuff out of her cheating ex’s apartment.

9PM | The CW
Ringer – I confess, this is my new guilty pleasure of the fall season. Tonight, Bridget finds out some veeery interesting info on Andrew, as well as a clue that might lead her to the person who wants to kill Siobhan.

9:30PM | FOX
Raising Hope – Burt finds out a secret about Sabrina’s family, which leads her to introduce the Chances to her dad (guest star Stephen Root).

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Chopped – In the finale of the champions tournament cherry soda and catfish are among the mystery basket ingredients standing between the final four and that $50,000 prize.

10PM | NBC
Parenthood – Kristina worries about Crosby and Adam’s new business, while Sarah worries about remaining close to Amber, who’s off enjoying her independence.

10PM | MTV
Teen Mom: Check Up with Dr. Drew – In part one of the post-season three reunion, Dr. Drew grills Farrah and Amber about their shenanigans throughout the season.

11PM | MTV – 1ST SEASON FINALE
Awkward – It’s winter formal time, and Jenna hopes that means Matty will ask her to be his date. But he’s not the only dude who wants to spend time with her. Her bigger, more pressing issue: that the nasty Sadie seems seriously committed to making sure Jenna is not crowned princess of the big dance.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The Biggest Loser (8PM, NBC) contestants have their gym time restricted;
– On the Dancing With the Stars results show (9PM, ABC), the latest castoff is revealed and the Script performs;
– Callen continues to search for clues about his past on NCIS: Los Angeles (9PM, CBS);
– While Rachel goes into overdrive for the Oscars on The Rachel Zoe Project (9PM, Style), Rodger, he of the ridiculously spelled name, goes to Vegas to party with his friends;
– Style Exposed: Sperm Donor (9PM, Style) unfolds the story of a man named Ben, a sperm donor whose, ahem, deposits, have resulted in more than 70 children;
– New Tosh.0 on Comedy Central (10PM);
– Carrie tries to help a young boy remember the murder he witnessed, so he can help police catch the killer, on Unforgettable (10PM, CBS).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Marisa Tomei;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Seth Rogen;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Melinda Gates;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Jack Hanna and Anna Faris;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Lauren Graham and Seth MacFarlane;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Glen Campbell;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Foo Fighters;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Mary Lynn Rajskub;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Butch Walker.

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• Filed in Late Night, Teen Mom, TV Picks
• Tags: 24 Hours in the ER, Awkward MTV, Chopped, Downsized, Glee, NCIS, New Girl, Parenthood, Raising Hope, Ringer, Sons of Anarchy, Teen Mom: Check Up with Dr. Drew

(ALL TIMES ET)

8PM | ABC FAMILY – 2ND SEASON SUMMER FINALE
Pretty Little Liars – Ticked off that the girls chatted with Dr. Sullivan, A makes them carry out a series of tasks designed to bring pain and humiliation to them, or else she’ll do something very, very bad to the good doctor.

9PM | WE
Downsized – The stress of their financial situation, which took a negative turn with the hospital bill for Rex‘s recent emergency, leads Todd and Laura to argue, which youngest daughter Danielle takes as a sign that they’re going to get a divorce.

9PM | FUSE
Red Hot Chili Peppers Live From the Roxy– The title says it all: Peppers, live, Roxy Theatre in Los Angeles.

10PM | TLC – SERIES PREMIERE
Big Sexy – The reality series follows five plus-sized women who live in Manhattan and are trying to break into the fashion world, no small feat for anyone, but a particular challenge for anyone who wears a double-digit dress size.

10PM | FOOD NETWORK – 9TH SEASON PREMIERE
Chopped Champions – I know, I know, I don’t understand Food Network’s season premieres and finales either … I’m still not exactly sure when the last season ended. But hey, we’re getting new episodes of Chopped, so what’s there to complain about? Tonight’s ep kicks off the Champions’ Tournament, in which four past winners return to compete for a $50,000 grand prize. Among the mystery basket items: antelope and pie crust. Antelope pie? I stand corrected that there’s no way to make pie a bad thing.

10PM | SUNDANCE – SERIES PREMIERE
Quirky – This reality series follows the company of the same name, which gives Regular Joe and Jane inventors the chance to see their products actually make it to the marketplace. And tonight’s premiere includes the coolest power strip you’ll ever see, once which … ah, here’s the link. You’re so gonna wanna buy it.

10PM | MTV
Teen Mom – Maci wonders whether or not she should continue her education, Farrah has a huge fight with her ‘rents about moving, Catelynn has a reunion with her dad and Amber tries to reconnect with Gary. And his Belden Lineman Camp t-shirt, I assume.

11PM | MTV
Awkward – My, how the tables have turned: Jenna, deliciously, finds that Matty and Jake both want her attention.

9PM | CURRENT
50 Documentaries to See Before You Die – The fifth, and final, part of Morgan Spurlock‘s miniseries about documentaries includes the top 10 picks, i.e. Roger & Me, An Inconvenient Truth, Hoop Dreams and, yes, Super Size Me.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– On The Looney Tunes Show (8PM, Cartoon Network), Bugs gets a new job;
– It’s a Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick) classic: someone considers taking their relationship “to the next level”;
– The documentary 9/11: Where Were You? (10PM, NGC) catches up with survivors of the Sept. 11 attacks.

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Steve Martin and Atticus Shaffer (REPEAT);
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Jason Bateman (REPEAT);
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Gloria Steinem;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Alec Baldwin and Lenny Kravitz;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Jeff Bridges;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Jesse Eisenberg and Jerry Springer (REPEAT);
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Will Forte and Amy Sedaris;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Chi McBride;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Adam Carolla (REPEAT).

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• Filed in Late Night, Teen Mom, TV Picks
• Tags: 50 Documentaries To See Before You Die, Awkward, Big Sexy, Chopped Champions, Downsized, Pretty Little Liars, Quirky, Red Hot Chili Peppers Live From the Roxy, Teen Mom