(ALL TIMES ET)

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Restaurant: Impossible – Sure, it’s already been done, and is still being done on Fox’s Friday nights, in fact, by Gordon Ramsay, but don’t write this Food Network version of Kitchen Nightmares off. Gordo’s antics have worn thin, especially since many of his makeovers seem to revolve more around his own ego than around helping out struggling restaurant owners. But Restaurant: Impossible host Chef Robert Irvine not only appears to be invested in helping his clients first and foremost, but he performs some pretty impressive menu, decor and attitude makeovers on a tight $10,000 budget for each episode. Tonight, Robert heads off to Rascal’s BBQ & Crab House in New Castle, Delaware, where he’s dismayed to find a filthy kitchen, mounds of garbage and very few customers. Let’s just say the Rascal’s folks will test his budget and his patience.

8PM | FOX
American Idol – First round auditions continue in Austin. Steven Tyler‘s first round creepiness in flirting with 16-year-olds also continues in Austin.

9PM | HISTORY CHANNEL
Bigfoot: The Definitive Guide – Seeking to prove – or disprove – once and for all the existence of Bigfoot, a.k.a. Sasquatch.

9PM | FOX
Human Target – Tony “Buster Bluth” Hale is back as bumbling P.I. Harry. Here’s hoping that Arrested Development movie happens soon, because we don’t get to see enough of that guy.

9PM | TLC
My Strange Addiction – Tonight’s subjects: A woman addicted to cleaning her house and another woman who’s obsessed with collecting rocks. Nope, both of those things still seem perfectly normal compared to last week’s sex doll guy.

10PM | CBS
Blue Bloods – An undercover counterterrorism agent is shot and Frank (Tom Selleck) assigns the investigation to the only man he knows he can trust: His son Danny (Donnie Wahlberg). But because the agent was trying to infiltrate a sleeper cell and Frank doesn’t want to blow his cover, Danny can’t tell anyone what he’s investigating.

10PM | SYFY
Face Off – For tonight’s challenge on this fun special effects makeup competition series, the contestants have to do full body makeup presentations. And yes, the Face Off host is Sheridan Crane.

10PM | MTV
I Used to Be Fat – So much good TV, way too much of it on at 10PM. Like this inspiring weight loss series, which focuses on teens like Daria, a lonely girl whose attempts to shed extra pounds would get a big boost if only she had her mother’s support.

10PM | BRAVO
Top Chef: All-Stars – Creating a three-course Italian meal is the challenge, and the contestants have some tough guest judges to impress in Isaac Mizrahi and The Sopranos‘ Lorraine Bracco.

10:30PM | A&E
Storage Wars – What makes this show so compelling? The big personalities, sure, but I think we’re also truly fascinated by stuff … the stuff people will pay good money to store, and the stuff that people will abandon, even though they once paid good money to store it. In tonight’s episode, those aforementioned big personalities head to Las Vegas to scope out new old stuff.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– A fascinating installment on how the brain really works includes Penn and Teller explaining how the brain processes visual info, while Mo Rocca shares what he learns about mind control on Nova scienceNow (8PM, PBS);
– On Man v. Food: The Carnivore Chronicles (9PM, Travel Channel), Adam visits Katz Deli in New York City, a.k.a. the place where Meg Ryan really enjoyed her sandwich in When Harry Met Sally;
– A billionaire (guest star Colm Feore) uses his cash, and his well-paid attorney, to derail a charge against him of sexually abusing a teenage girl on Law & Order: SVU (10PM, NBC);
– Erica tries to get over her breakup with Ethan, while Dr. Tom wants to talk about Claire on Being Erica (11PM, SOAPnet);
– Friends alum, and star of the upcoming ABC comedy Mr. Sunshine, Matthew Perry, visits The Daily Show (11PM, Comedy Central);
– And the always hilarious Jim Gaffigan visits The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS).

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• Tags: American Idol, Bigfoot: The Definitive Guide, Blue Bloods, Face Off, Human Target, I Used to Be Fat, My Strange Addiction, Restaurant: Impossible, Storage Wars, Tom Selleck, Top Chef: All-Stars

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– Law & Order will go for a 20th season on NBC, tying it with classic CBS western Gunsmoke as the longest-running primetime drama.

– Here’s a sneak peek at Fox’s new fall shows, including the awesome Human Target and The Cleveland Show.

– The View co-host Sherri Shepherd will have to split her time between her daytime gig and her new Lifetime sitcom, Sherri, which was picked up by Lifetime today. The autobiographical-ish comedy revolves around Shepherd’s character dealing with her husband’s infidelity by inviting his babymama and her baby to move in with her.

– Send good thoughts to Survivor champ Ethan Zohn, who’s battling a rare form of Hodgkin’s disease.

– Conan O’Brien‘s first Tonight Show guests on June 1: Will Ferrell and Pearl Jam.

– 24 season eight will premiere on Fox with a two-night, four-hour event that kicks off on Jan. 17. Only eight more months to go! Season seven, BTW, even though it just ended last night, is already on DVD today.

– It’s a buzzkill that ABC cancelled Samantha Who?. Here’s hoping Christina Applegate is back on the tube ASAP.

– G4’s summer line-up will include series about wannabe poker champs in 2 Months, $2 Million, and comedians commenting on “outrageous clips from women around the world participating in unusual activities” in The International Sexy Ladies Show.

– Ricky Gervais will create an animated series for HBO, based on his popular and hilarious podcasts with pals Stephen Merchant and Karl Pilkington.

– Grey’s Anatomy and Private Practice creator Shonda Rhimes‘ new series Inside the Box, about a Washington DC newsroom, didn’t make the cut for ABC’s fall schedule, and has, according to Deadline Hollywood Daily, been sent back for “redevelopment.” Maybe execs just realized that both of her existing series were so lame this season that they require her attention more?

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• Tags: 24, Christine Applegate, Conan O'Brien, DVD, Ethan Zohn, Grey's Anatomy, Gunsmoke, HBO, Human Target, Inside the Box, Law & Order, Lifetime, Pearl Jam, Private Practice, Ricky Gervais, Samantha Who?, Sherri, Sherri Shepherd, Shonda Rhimes, Survivor, The Cleveland Show, The View, Tonight Show, Will Ferrell

Here’s the official line-up from Fox, followed by the network’s description of its new series:

FOX PRIMETIME SCHEDULE: FALL 2009
(All Times ET/PT)

MONDAY
8PM – House
9PM – Lie to Me

TUESDAY
8PM – So You Think You Can Dance performance show

WEDNESDAY
8PM – So You Think You Can Dance results show
9PM – Glee

THURSDAY
8PM – Bones
9PM – Fringe

FRIDAY
8PM – Brothers
8:30PM – ‘Til Death
9PM – Dollhouse

SATURDAY
8PM – Cops
8:30PM – Cops
9PM – America’s Most Wanted
11PM – The Wanda Sykes Show (working title)
Midnight – “Animation Domination” encores

SUNDAY
7PM – The OT (NFL post-game show)
8PM – The Simpsons
8:30PM – The Cleveland Show
9PM – Family Guy
9:30PM – American Dad

…Read more

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• Tags: 'Til Death, 24, America's Most Wanted, American Dad, American Idol, Bones, Brothers, Cops, Dollhouse, Family Guy, Fringe, Glee, House, Human Target, Lie to Me, NFL, Past Life, So You Think You Can Dance, Sons of Tucson, The Cleveland Show, The OT, The Simpsons, The Wanda Sykes Show

A rundown of what is/isn’t/might be popping up on the 2009-10 primetime schedule at Fox during this week’s Upfront presentation …

Fox (Upfront presentation: Monday, May 18)
Returning series: 24, American Dad, American Idol, Bones, Dollhouse, Family Guy, Fringe, Hell’s Kitchen, House, Kitchen Nightmares, Lie to Me, The Simpsons, So You Think You Can Dance, ‘Til Death

New series:
– Brothers (Comedy)
Plot: A former NFL pro tries to reconnect with his family, including his wheelchair-bound older brother
It stars: Former NFL pro Michael Strahan and wheelchair-bound comedian Darryl Mitchell
It’s like: A potentially refreshing new concept, actually

– The Cleveland Show (Animated comedy)
Plot: The Family Guy spin-off features Peter Griffin pal Cleveland Brown, as he moves his family from Quahog to Virginia
It stars: Mike Henry as Cleveland and Sanaa Lathan as his wife Donna
It’s like: Family Guy

– Glee (Musical dramedy)
Plot: A teacher, and former glee club member himself, signs on as advisor to the students at his school’s glee club
It stars: Broadway stars Lea Michele and Matthew Morrison, Kyle XY‘s Cory Monteith and the always hilarious Jane Lynch, and was created by Nip/Tuck‘s Ryan Murphy
It’s like: Fame-meets-Election-meets-90210, with more heart and a better soundtrack (lots of Journey!)

– Human Target (Drama)
Plot: Christopher Chance (Keen Eddie and Fringe‘s Mark Valley) is a freelance security agent who assumes his clients’ identities, thus making himself the “human target”
It stars: Valley, Jackie Earle Haley and Chi McBride
It’s like: The DC Comics series of the same name

– Past Life (Drama)
Plot: A psychologist and former cop try to help people solve mysteries about their past lives
It stars: Richard Schiff (The West Wing) and comedian Ravi Patel
It’s like: A series you’d imagine Shirley MacLaine pitching

– Sons of Tucson (Comedy)
Plot: A charming grafter is hired by three brothers to act as their dad when their real father is in jail for a white collar crime
It stars: Reaper‘s Tyler Labine, while Malcolm in the Middle star Justin Berfield is an executive producer
It’s like: In the spirit of The Slums of Beverly Hills, according to buzz

Other potential new series:
– Maggie Hill (Drama)
Plot: A female surgeon has adult-onset schizophrenia but manages to thrive in her career anyway
It stars: Newcomer Christina Cole, Alfre Woodard and Luke Mably
It’s like: Enough to make you want to ask your doctor for a copy of his or her mental evaluation

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• Tags: Brothers, Chi McBride, Cleveland Brown, Cleveland Show, Cory Monteith, Darryl Mitchell, Fall TV season, Family Guy, Fox, Glee, Human Target, Jackie Earle Haley, Jane Lynch, Justin Berfield, Lea Michele, Maggie Hill, Mark Valley, Matthew Morrison, Michael Strahan, Past Life, Reaper, Richard Schiff, Ryan Murphy, Sanaa Lathan, Sons of Tucson, spin-off, Tyler Labine, Upfront