A rundown of what is/isn’t/might be popping up on the 2009-10 primetime schedule at Fox during this week’s Upfront presentation …

Fox (Upfront presentation: Monday, May 18)
Returning series: 24, American Dad, American Idol, Bones, Dollhouse, Family Guy, Fringe, Hell’s Kitchen, House, Kitchen Nightmares, Lie to Me, The Simpsons, So You Think You Can Dance, ‘Til Death

New series:
– Brothers (Comedy)
Plot: A former NFL pro tries to reconnect with his family, including his wheelchair-bound older brother
It stars: Former NFL pro Michael Strahan and wheelchair-bound comedian Darryl Mitchell
It’s like: A potentially refreshing new concept, actually

– The Cleveland Show (Animated comedy)
Plot: The Family Guy spin-off features Peter Griffin pal Cleveland Brown, as he moves his family from Quahog to Virginia
It stars: Mike Henry as Cleveland and Sanaa Lathan as his wife Donna
It’s like: Family Guy

– Glee (Musical dramedy)
Plot: A teacher, and former glee club member himself, signs on as advisor to the students at his school’s glee club
It stars: Broadway stars Lea Michele and Matthew Morrison, Kyle XY‘s Cory Monteith and the always hilarious Jane Lynch, and was created by Nip/Tuck‘s Ryan Murphy
It’s like: Fame-meets-Election-meets-90210, with more heart and a better soundtrack (lots of Journey!)

– Human Target (Drama)
Plot: Christopher Chance (Keen Eddie and Fringe‘s Mark Valley) is a freelance security agent who assumes his clients’ identities, thus making himself the “human target”
It stars: Valley, Jackie Earle Haley and Chi McBride
It’s like: The DC Comics series of the same name

– Past Life (Drama)
Plot: A psychologist and former cop try to help people solve mysteries about their past lives
It stars: Richard Schiff (The West Wing) and comedian Ravi Patel
It’s like: A series you’d imagine Shirley MacLaine pitching

– Sons of Tucson (Comedy)
Plot: A charming grafter is hired by three brothers to act as their dad when their real father is in jail for a white collar crime
It stars: Reaper‘s Tyler Labine, while Malcolm in the Middle star Justin Berfield is an executive producer
It’s like: In the spirit of The Slums of Beverly Hills, according to buzz

Other potential new series:
– Maggie Hill (Drama)
Plot: A female surgeon has adult-onset schizophrenia but manages to thrive in her career anyway
It stars: Newcomer Christina Cole, Alfre Woodard and Luke Mably
It’s like: Enough to make you want to ask your doctor for a copy of his or her mental evaluation

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• Tags: Brothers, Chi McBride, Cleveland Brown, Cleveland Show, Cory Monteith, Darryl Mitchell, Fall TV season, Family Guy, Fox, Glee, Human Target, Jackie Earle Haley, Jane Lynch, Justin Berfield, Lea Michele, Maggie Hill, Mark Valley, Matthew Morrison, Michael Strahan, Past Life, Reaper, Richard Schiff, Ryan Murphy, Sanaa Lathan, Sons of Tucson, spin-off, Tyler Labine, Upfront

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– The year’s biggest American Idol shocker could turn out to be that Kris Allen earned himself a spot in the final two with his memorable spin on Kanye West‘s “Heartless” on last night’s Idol.

– Jim Krasinski says to expect a cool Jim/Pam story in Thursday night’s fifth-season finale of The Office.

– Discovery Channel is planning a high-def sequel to its incredible Planet Earth series, called Wild Planet: North America.

– Mark Valley, who’s gotten lost in the shuffle on shows like Boston Legal and Fringe after his terrific, but cancelled-too-soon dramedy Keen Eddie, may finally have landed another great series. Fox is reportedly moving forward with Human, based on a DC Comic, in which Valley stars as Christopher Chance, a guy who offers security for hire services by assuming the identities of people in danger (i.e. he becomes the “target” for them). Jackie Earle Haley and Chi McBride are also among the cool cast.

– Alanis Morissette will play Nancy’s (Mary-Louise Parker) baby doctor when Weeds begins its fifth season on June 8.

– Chad Michael Murray and Hilarie Burton will not be returning to One Tree Hill next season, as has been the rumor for months.

– Guess who thinks there should be a Creed-centric episode of The Office? Creed. I totally agree.

– Like Rodney Dangerfield, Tony Danza is going back to school. Danza, who admits that “nobody’s knocking down (his) door for acting jobs,” will teach 10th grade English in a New York City school, and film the whole experience for an A&E reality series. That’s one of the more interesting, and least sleazy, reality show ideas to pop up in quite a while.

– A&E is all about the celebreality genre next season, in fact, with other new shows on the horizon from Shaq, Bob Saget, MC Hammer and Steven Seagal, while most of the network’s other new shows fall into the crime drama category. The best news: Parking Wars will be back for another season.

– Jamie Foxx will host the BET Awards on June 28 in Los Angeles, with performances by Ne-Yo and Maxwell.

– Starz has given Party Down, an underrated comedy that you should be watching, a second-season pick-up.

– And Paulina Porizkova explained her firing from America’s Next Top Model to Craig Ferguson last night.

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• Filed in American Idol, Celebreality, Comedy, Drama, TV News
• Tags: A&E, America's Next Top Model, American Idol, BET, BET Awards, Bob Saget, Celebreality, Chad Michael Murray, Craig Ferguson, Creed Bratton, Hilarie Burton, Jamie Foxx, Jim Krasinski, Kris Allen, Mark Valley, Mary-Louise Parker, One Tree Hill, Parking Wars, Party Down, Planet Earth, Reality, Starz, The Office, Tony Danza, Weeds