Paula Abdul Twittered Tuesday night that she won’t be returning to American Idol next season, and though that seemed like it might be a last-ditch negotiation tactic on her part, Fox has issued a statement confirming she’s gone:

“Paula Abdul has been an important part of the American Idol family over the last eight seasons and we are saddened that she has decided not to return to the show. While Paula will not be continuing with us, she’s a tremendous talent and we wish her the best.”

Wow. I’m truly surprised that Fox and the AI producers would let the situation spin this out of control with Abdul. That she was demanding, according to rumors, to be paid as much as Simon Cowell or Ryan Seacrest – both of whom I would argue are more integral to the show than Abdul, judge Randy Jackson and most definitely newbie judge Kara DioGuardi – was unreasonable, but that the two sides couldn’t come to a compromise is ridiculous on both sides.

Abdul’s absence will be felt on Idol. DioGuardi is not a suitable replacement, as evidenced by the fact that, in most polls, the numbers of people who wanted her not to return for another season were pretty equal to the number of people who did want to see her back. If the judging table consists of only Simon, Randy and Kara for season nine, I think we viewers will really miss Paula’s loopiness, her chemistry with Simon, and, though it could be annoying when she went on and on about a certain contestant at times, her positivity.

That’s not to say Abdul isn’t replaceable. Cowell isn’t. Abdul may be, but it won’t be easy. DioGuardi didn’t click with viewers the way Abdul did. There are more rumors that an Abdul replacement will be added to the mix … last month, there were even stories that Jennifer Lopez had been approached to take over Abdul’s chair. That could have been interesting, but since J. Lo shot those murmurings down right away, it isn’t likely to happen. So, as it stands right now, we’re looking at a table of just three judges, with one who people love to hate and hate to love, one who just hasn’t bonded with viewers at all and one who seems to have three speeds: “Yo dawg, that was hot,” “Yo dawg, that was pitchy” and namechecking all the musicians he’s worked with in his career.

As for Abdul, her music career is, at best, an afterthought at this point, and while she still has her HSN jewelry line, her weekly appearances on Idol served as a (free) platform for pimping the trinkets, which she often wore on the show and even passed along to contestants.

In short, Idol needs Abdul (maybe not to the tune of the $20 million a year she reportedly demanded, but still) and Abdul needs Idol. The show’s a cash cow … hard to believe execs weren’t willing to make sure a deal happened. With ratings on the show slipping with each season, something, clearly, needs to change to keep viewers’ interest, but letting Abdul bounce isn’t that change.

Here’s hoping that in the few days left before the show officially begins auditioning for the 2010 season, savvier heads will prevail.

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• Tags: American Idol, Paula Abdul, Paula Abdul quits American Idol

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– Will you tune in for the return of Jon & Kate Plus 8 tonight on TLC (9PM ET). TLC execs claim the Gosselins’ new situation makes them more relatable, but I’d argue that it just makes them more douchebag-able.

– I’m sure I wasn’t the only Guiding Light fan hoping for a last-minute reprieve for the long-running daytime soap, but Light‘s cancelation is officially official now that a replacement show has been lined up. Wayne Brady will host a revival of Let’s Make a Deal that will air in GL‘s place. The soap, which debuted on CBS on June 30, 1952, will air its series finale on Sept. 18.

– There’s still no deal for Paula Abdul, but Kara DioGuardi is definitely returning to the American Idol judges table next season. Meh.

– Futurama will return with new episodes in 2010, and with the original voice talent cast intact.

– PBS has announced a new Sesame Street primetime special, Families Stand Together: Feeling Secure in Tough Times, which will help families with young kids explain and deal with current economic woes. Elmo hosts (with Al Roker, Deborah Roberts and his Muppet pals), and the show is paired with another PBS special, Your Life, Your Money, hosted by Scrubs’ Donald Faison, and aimed at young people. The specials debut on PBS on Sept. 9 (8-10PM).

– More news from Sesame Street: The show’s upcoming 40th season will include a Mad Men spoof. Minus the smoking, drinking, cursing, bed-hopping and, in the case of Freddy Rumsen, pants-wetting, presumably.

– The Emmys snubbed Battlestar Galactica and True Blood, but the Television Critics Association honored the shows last weekend, naming them Program of the Year and Best New Program, respectively.

– The Sunday New York Times featured a story on how badly some reality TV contestants are treated, which was surprising at first, and makes you wonder why they would subject themselves to being locked in hotel rooms and having all manner of communication with the outside world cut off. But then you remember: They’re willing to bare incredibly personal details about their lives on TV – and, according to many of them, they’re often plied with copious amounts of hooch – so maybe not being able to text and Twitter for a few weeks doesn’t seem like such a big deal?

– Another victim of the economy: Marie Osmond‘s comeback talk show.

– On the other hand, Tom Arnold‘s TV comeback is right on track, as the ex-Mr. Roseanne will write and possibly star in a new NBC sitcom, and has a recurring role on the new season of Sons of Anarchy.

– And tonight in primetime:

– The families head for the Grand Canyon on Great American Road Trip (8PM ET, NBC)
– George ‘fesses up to Anne about something on The Secret Life of an American Teenager (8PM, ABC Family)
– ABC has a Sugarland concert at 8PM
– Jon & Kate Plus 8 returns, post-separation, on TLC (9PM)
– Kyra Sedgwick and Kevin Bacon‘s daughter Sosie guest stars as Brenda’s niece on The Closer (9PM, TNT)
– A TV crew sparks rivalry among the girls on Make It or Break It (9PM, ABC Family)
– Old-school nookie is the focus of the series premiere of Sex in the Ancient World (9PM, History Channel)
– Real and Chance try to find skank love again on the Real Chance of Love 2 premiere (VH1, 9PM)
– Shark Week continues with Deadly Waters (9PM, Discovery), a look at the five most dangerous, shark-infested bodies of water
– It’s the season premiere of Guy Fieri‘s Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives on Food Network (10PM)
– Kathy works to make her upcoming autobio super spicy on Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List (10PM, Bravo)
– Celia and Dean come up with marketing plans for their new biz on Weeds (10PM, Showtime)
– More Dating in the Dark at 10PM on ABC
– Drama ensues when the musicians move into their new home on Making His Band (10PM, MTV)
– Tony recalls the best street food he’s eaten from around the world on Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations (10PM, Travel Channel)
– TLC premieres its new cake-baking competition series, Ultimate Cake Off (10PM)
– Terrell meets with his estranged dad on The T.O. Show (10PM, VH1)
– And Jackie’s drug use begins to catch up with her physically and with her decision-making at work on Nurse Jackie (10:30PM, Showtime)

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• Tags: American Idol, Donald Faison, Futurama, Guiding Light finale Sept. 18, Jon & Kate Plus 8, Kara DioGuardi, Marie Osmond talk show, Paula Abdul, Reality TV contestants, Sesame Street 40th anniversary, Sesame Street Mad Men spoof, Sons of Anarchy, TCA Awards, Tom Arnold, Wayne Brady Let's Make a Deal

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– I still can’t believe that Adam Lambert‘s sexuality is such an issue … like being gay in the entertainment industry is such a new phenomenon? Or being gay on American Idol for that matter. Whatever. Adam lands a solo cover on the new Entertainment Weekly, even before he wins the show, as “the most exciting American Idol contestant in years.” Can’t argue with that.

– It’s not Project Runway, but the Runway-ish The Fashion Show, which debuts tonight on Bravo (10PM ET), does have the fabulous Isaac Mizrahi.

– Grey’s Anatomy airs its 100th episode tonight (ABC, 9PM), and it’s supposed to include a McDreamy/Meredith wedding. Supposed to being the key part of that sentence.

– Even if the Mer/Der wedding does go down, will it be one of the best tube weddings ever? Maybe one of the worst? I countdown a few of each at Hollywood.com today.

– Are you more or less likely to watch the new season of Jon & Kate Plus 8 on May 25, given the whole affair brouhaha?

– Tomorrow’s Good Morning America will feature Diane Sawyer’s interview with Connie Culp, the woman whose face transplant made headlines this week.

– Chuck executive producer McG weighs in optimistically to Sci Fi Wire about the show’s chances for a third season on NBC. It’s tough to remember the last time an on-the-bubble series generated as much support and good will as Chuck has, so here’s hoping again that it returns next season.

– Seth Green and his Robot Chicken cohorts are bringing another show to Adult Swim.

– Only The Big O could incite riots by trying to give away some damn chicken.

– Is it just me, or do most of the contestants on the new season of The Bachelorette look alike?

– And Simon Cowell reportedly earns $36 million a season for American Idol, while co-judge Paula Abdul nets “just” $2 million. Sounds right to me.

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• Tags: Adam Lambert, American Idol, Chuck, Connie Culp, Grey's Anatomy, Isaac Mizrahi, Jon & Kate Plus 8, Oprah, Paula Abdul, Project Runway, Robot Chicken, Seth Green, Simon Cowell, The Bachelorette, TV weddings

All the tube news that’s fit to surf …

– Great news: Mad Men will return for its third season on A&E in August.

– Bad news: Dennis Rodman‘s goin’ to rehab. The good news: Since he’s obviously not averse to making a boob of himself on TV, now he can sign up for Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew Pinsky.

– Old Christine may get a new home. If CBS dumps the Julia Louis-Dreyfus sitcom The New Adventures of Old Christine, ABC says it’ll take the leftovers.

– The CW has decided to pull the plug on its Sunday night programming.

– Cap’n Jack (John Barrowman) is making an appearance in David Tennant‘s final Doctor Who ep.

– Jennifer Hudson won an Oscar, and now another American Idol alum could win a Tony, as Constantine Maroulis snags a nod for his role in the musical Rock of Ages.

– More Idol news: Paula Abdul‘s singing on tonight’s “Rock Week” episode.

– And still more Idol news, news that should make the aforementioned Ms. Abdul quite happy: TVGuide.com readers have spoken, and nearly 60 percent of them think newbie judge Kara DioGuardi should turn in her Coke cup after this season.

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• Tags: American Idol, Celebrity Rehab, Doctor Who, Drew Pinsky, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Kara DioGuardi, Mad Men, Paula Abdul