(ALL TIMES ET)

10 and 11PM | MTV
Teen Mom 2 – Here’s a little extra somethin’ Santa forgot to put under the tree: the gift of back-to-back new installments of Teen Mom 2.

8 and 9PM | WE
Texas Multi Mamas – Is this reality drama really just a thinly, er, not at all veiled knockoff of Real Housewives, with women who have multiples as the common denominator? Yes it is. Should you care? No. Is it awesome? Yes, it is. Especially when the smug Stephanie gets her much-anticipated boob job, but then has to spend her recovery time with her monster-in-law … #realitytvstarproblems.

8:30 and 10PM | A&E
Storage Wars – New episodes bookend the premiere of another new Wars (see below).

9PM | LIFETIME – 2ND SEASON PREMIERE
Dance Moms – She’s baaaaack. Lock up your children and their self-esteem.

9PM | A&E – SERIES PREMIERE
Shipping Wars – Yep, now shippers, those who specialize in the transport of various unusual and often delicate, items, are at Wars with each other. Storage locker auction bidders and specialty transporters, can’t we all just get along?

9PM | NGC
Taboo – An episode revolving around “odd couples,” including a woman whose boyfriend is three times her height, a gay man married to a woman and a three-way marriage that will make that Sister Wives gang look almost charming in comparison.

9PM | ABC
Celebrity Wife Swap – The wives of Dee “Twisted Sister” Snider and Flavor “Public Enemy” Flav swap households for a week. Hilarity and insanity of the completely expected variety ensue.

10PM | LIFETIME
24 Hour Catwalk – This new fashion competition series, with its quick challenges and mystery box of ingredients, is a lot like Chopped …

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Chopped – … which does a far better, more compelling job of making the format work. And Geoffrey Zakarian rules!

10PM | NBC
Parenthood – Sarah considers having another child, You should consider catching up with this fine drama, if you haven’t yet, on Netflix.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Dr. Huizenga performs health assessments that shake up the contestants on The Biggest Loser (8PM, NBC);
– On NCIS (8PM, CBS), a female lieutenant is murdered, and her husband, a detective, keeps interrupting the investigation;
– Jada Khaled is kidnapped on NCIS: Los Angeles (9PM, CBS);
– Carrie digs into a college student’s death on Unforgettable (10PM, CBS);
– Robin Thicke and Tori Spelling visit Andy Cohen on Watch What Happens: Live (11PM, Bravo).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Chelsea Handler;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Judge Andrew Napolitano;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Bill Moyers;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Marv Albert and Kate Beckinsale;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Queen Latifah;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Dermot Mulroney;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Tina Fey;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Isaac Mizrahi;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Roy Choi (REPEAT).

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• Filed in Late Night, Teen Mom, TV Picks
• Tags: Storage Wars, Teen Mom 2, Texas Multi Mamas

(ALL TIMES ET)

9PM | ABC
Celebrity Wife Swap – No matter how unique, ahem, you find Gary Busey to be, you are still not fully prepared to see him at home, as his fiancée/babymama swaps homes with the religious wife of scandal-embroiled pastor Ted Haggard.

8PM | NBC – 13TH SEASON PREMIERE
The Biggest Loser – A whole new collection of couples arrive at the Biggest Loser ranch and are greeted by a twist: they’re going to be split up and forced to compete against each other.

8PM | CBS
NCIS – While investigating the murder of a commander, the team runs into E.J. Barrett (Sarah Jane Morris).

8:30PM | ESPN
2012 Sugar Bowl – Michigan vs. Virginia Tech.

8:30PM | ABC – SERIES PREMIERE
Work It – So, about this Bosom Buddies knock-off … Do not consider this a recommendation to watch a good show. Consider it a recommendation to watch a show that’s so ridiculously silly you have to watch it at least once.

9PM | NGC
Taboo: Secret Lives – Wow. Among the people living secret lives are a married (and successful) businessman who pretends to be homeless, a psych student who pretends to be a blue cat and a woman who pretends to be a paraplegic dependent on a wheelchair.

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Chopped – There’s fruit in the app basket and cheese in the dessert basket.

10PM | NBC
Parenthood – It’s a Braverman family road trip as the gang heads out together to visit Zeek’s mama.

10 and 10:30PM | A&E
Storage Wars – In back-to-back eps, Brandi goes auctioning by herself for the first time, and then the crew heads to North Hollywood for some storage scavenging.

10PM | MTV
Teen Mom 2 – The moms and their tots celebrate Christmas, while Jenelle and Chelsea make more bad decisions regarding their boyfriends.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– Nell goes undercover on a new NCIS: Los Angeles (9PM, CBS);
– It’s the season four of drunken college student shenanigans on Campus PD (10PM, G4);
– When a construction worker is murdered on Unforgettable (10PM, CBS), Carrie and Al try to determine if the killing was mob-related;
– It’s back-to-back Extreme Couponing: All-Stars episodes on TLC (10 and 10:30PM).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Gary Oldman;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Charles Barkley;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Senator Bernie Sanders;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Will Arnett;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Snooki and Whitney Cummings;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Christina Ricci and the male cast members of Jersey Shore;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): William H. Macy;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Carrie Fisher;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Miranda July (REPEAT).

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• Filed in Late Night, Reality, Teen Mom, TV Picks
• Tags: 2012 Sugar Bowl, Celebrity Wife Swap, NCIS, Storage Wars, The Biggest Loser season 13, Work It premiere ABC

(ALL TIMES ET)

9PM | USA – 3RD SEASON SUMMER FINALE
Royal Pains – Hank and Evan have it out when Evan learns Hank knew about Paige’s problem. Elsewhere, Wilmer Valderrama guest stars as an art collector who passes out when he finally sees a piece of art he’s been pursuing for years, and everyone finds out what Divya has been up to.

10PM | DIRECTV
Damages – Patty and Ellen depose Howard Erickson (John Goodman).

10PM | FX
Rescue Me – Colleen gets married, and when Gavins and booze come together … insanity, of course, ensues.

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Restaurant: Impossible – Chef Robert goes to Scrimmages, a sports bar in Delaware that’s fumbling because the four owners are fighting with each other.

10 and 10:30PM | A&E
Storage Wars – Dave and Jarrod butt heads (more so than usual) and, just guessing here, Barry makes fun of both of them.

10PM | BRAVO
Top Chef Just Desserts – The Los Angeles Philharmonic is the inspiration for tonight’s challenge, which involves presenting a cake in three movements.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The Power of Veto competition is held on Big Brother (8PM, CBS);
– On Famous Food (8PM, VH1), the restaurant finally opens, but the opening does not go well;
– Bianca tries to worm her way back into Drew’s life on Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick);
– The Challenge: Rivals Reunion (10PM, MTV) brings the contestants from the just-concluded 21st Real World/Road Rules Challenge together to rehash their adventures;
– In the season two finale of Hot in Cleveland (10PM, TV Land), it’s Elka’s (Betty White) wedding day, but she’s MIA after her bachelorette party, which included frat boys and an iguana.

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): John Krasinski (REPEAT);
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Sen. Dick Durbin (REPEAT);
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Kevin Mitnick (REPEAT);
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Aubrey Plaza and Thurston Moore;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Jay Mohr and Allison Janney;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Betty White (REPEAT);
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Jim Gaffigan;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Leslie Bibb and Louie Anderson;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Foster the People (REPEAT).

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• Filed in Betty White, Late Night, TV Picks
• Tags: Damages, Rescue Me, Restaurant: Impossible – Chef Robert, Royal Pains summer finale, Storage Wars, Top Chef Just Desserts

(ALL TIMES ET)

10:30PM | COMEDY CENTRAL – 1ST SEASON FINALE
Jon Benjamin Has a Van – Bob Odenkirk guest stars as a cult leader who crosses paths with Jon when Jon does a report on a religious sect that believes as one of its core tenants that Jesus smoked a pipe. Guess who picks up that habit himself, then?

9PM | USA
Royal Pains – Matt Lauer makes a cameo as Evan gets Hank an appearance on the Today show, without realizing that his bro has a major fear about public speaking.

9 and 9:30PM | LIFETIME
Roseanne’s Nuts – Roseanne‘s pals Phyllis Diller and Sandra Bernhard visit her in Hawaii, and a girls night out leads to a wicked hangover for Roseanne.

10PM | DIRECTV
Damages – In tonight’s installment, titled “We’ll Just Have to Find Another Way to Cut the Balls Off This Thing,” Patty hires a nurse to look after Catherine, while Ellen continues to battle Erickson (John Goodman) in court, which is made so much more difficult when Boorman (Dylan Baker) messes with her witness’ credibility.

10PM | FX
Rescue Me – Tommy and the gang try to cut reporter Pam Keppler off with a dose of her own medicine, while Sean works up the nerve to talk to Emily about their odor problem.

10 and 10:30PM | A&E
Storage Wars – Yeeeeeep, it’s true: Dave Hester faces his rival bidder at an auction in Mission Hills, California.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The Power of Veto competition is held on Big Brother (8PM, CBS);
– The whole team turns against Danielle on Famous Food (8PM, VH1);
– The final four perform on part one of the season 8 finale of So You Think You Can Dance (8PM, Fox);
– An accident could result in Jenna losing custody of her baby on Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick);
– Oliver Stone‘s living room is transformed into a screening room on Hollywood Hi-Tech (9:30PM, DIY);
– On The Challenge: Rivals (10PM, MTV), Wes and Paula attack Cara Maria, and Laurel steps in to defend her;
– Primetime Nightline: Celebrity Secrets (10PM, ABC) covers the impact of being in showbiz on kids, including Rebecca Black and Eden Wood.

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Aziz Ansari;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): John Coffee;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Elliott Ackerman;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Shia LaBeouf (REPEAT);
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Joel McHale;
– Lopez Tonight (Midnight, TBS): David Koechner and Jessica Alba;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Jesse Eisenberg, Incubus and Jerry Springer;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Snooki;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Howie Mandel (REPEAT);
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Ben Schwartz (REPEAT).

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• Filed in Late Night, TV Picks
• Tags: Damages, Jon Benjamin Has a Van season finale, Rescue Me, Roseanne's Nuts, Royal Pains, Storage Wars

(ALL TIMES ET)

9PM | USA
Royal Pains – Evan spends time with his grandfather (guest star Ed Asner) in hopes of helping Eddie’s (Henry Winkler) parole case, but he finds out the surprising real reason why his grandpa has been MIA from his life.

9PM | SCIENCE CHANNEL – SERIES PREMIERE
Wonders of the World – This new documentary series examining the atomic link between humanity and the universe is hosted by rocker/physicist Brian Cox.

9:30PM | DIY
Hollywood Hi-Tech – This will spark some home makeover envy: Nancy O’Dell gets a new family room with a 100-inch TV screen, five surround-sound speakers, cool new chairs and a love seat.

10PM | DIRECTV
Damages – Ellen’s case against Erickson (John Goodman) depends on soldier-turned-Erickson employee Chris Sanchez (Chris Messina), who’s in more than a little bit of danger because of it.

10PM | E!
E! True Hollywood Story: Snooki – I know, when you see the title of this entry in E!’s series, you think it’s a spoof, right? But it’s real … all too real.

10PM | FOOD NETWORK
Restaurant: Impossible – Chef Robert tries to help Virginia diner owners who are on the verge of bankruptcy because of mismanagement and a major issue with cleanliness.

10 and 10:30PM | A&E
Storage Wars – Laura fills in for sick auctioneer Dan, while the lockers she’s trying to unload include electronics and a cool movie prop.

10:30PM | COMEDY CENTRAL
Jon Benjamin Has a Van – Jon’s undercover assignment: Robbing a store. That sells surveillance equipment.

Worth flipping to during commercials:
– The Power of Veto competition happens on Big Brother (8PM, CBS);
– On Famous Food (8PM, VH1), Ashley fights with DJ Paul, Jake fights with Danielle and the whole gang has a run-in with designer Scott;
– Lady Gaga is a guest judge on So You Think You Can Dance (8PM, Fox);
– While working on the school play, Eli thinks he’s found a new love interest on Degrassi (9PM, TeenNick);
– James Van Der Beek guests as Janie’s fiancé (who’s in need of legal assistance after his bachelor party) on Franklin & Bash (9PM, TNT);
– Meat America (9PM, History) is a two-hour special on the history of beef, pork and chicken;
– On Roseanne’s Nuts (9 and 9:30PM, Lifetime), Roseanne takes surfing lessons and tries to prove to the locals that her Hawaiian museum is not haunted;
– Evan plots (again) to get rid of CT, who finds himself in a love triangle with Laurel and Mandi on The Challenge: Rivals (10PM, MTV);
– Jennifer Love Hewitt guest stars as Victoria’s daughter Emmy on Hot in Cleveland (10PM, TV Land);
– Tommy decides to give an interview for the 9/11 documentary on Rescue Me (10PM, FX);
– Cat Deeley and Raven-Symone are among the dinner guests on Rocco’s Dinner Party (10PM, Bravo).

And the late-night line-up:
– Conan (11PM, TBS): Kevin Connolly;
– The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (11PM, Comedy Central): Rachel Weisz;
– The Colbert Report (11:30PM, Comedy Central): Mary Cummings;
– The Late Show with David Letterman (11:35PM, CBS): Craig Ferguson;
– The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35PM, NBC): Vanessa Carlton and Chris Tucker;
– Lopez Tonight (Midnight, TBS): The Miz and Kate Walsh;
– Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05AM, ABC): Olivia Wilde;
– Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:35AM, NBC): Neil Patrick Harris;
– The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:37AM, CBS): Mary McCormack;
– Last Call with Carson Daly (1:35AM, NBC): Lykke Li (REPEAT).

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• Filed in Late Night, TV Picks
• Tags: Damages, E! True Hollywood Story: Snooki, Jon Benjamin Has a Van, Restaurant: Impossible, Royal Pains, Storage Wars, Wonders of the World Brian Cox